when you are REALLY tired, you always want the easy way out, its like listening to a scratched record over and over again when someone who thinks they know really doesnt know, and they try to preach to you. i remembered my mentally handicapped brother god rest his soul being tied to a radiator in the bathroom with a belt while my 22 yr old mother ran the street and left us, i remember being locked in a room for days with a skeleton key without food or water and being BEAT for sneaking out trying to find something to eat. i remember there being nothing in […]
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Old Mother
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I am a 33 year old mother of two, I was with the father of my son & daughter for 12 .1/2 years. I was 16 when we started our relationship. He was 10 years older then me and how I found out was though finding his driving licence as he told me when we first met that he was 21:- (26)was the truth  even then he still tried to say it was a fake. I should of realised then what he was all about but being only 16 young and being my first love I was blind!! I […]
I want to share my story, of who I am and how I got here, but I can’t share it with those I know so this seemed like the next best thing. I don’t know who is out there reading this, or if anyone even will, but there is a comfort in sharing how I feel without fear of judgment or persecution.
I will start with the easiest parts. I am a 29 year old mother of 3, married to a great man, and working at my dream job. I volunteer at my church and also lead a girl scout troop. So […]
We always believe it we have it so bad. If we didn’t, none of us would be here writing our stories that are filled with anger and pain. I suppose I am bitter. Bitter with everyone I trusted that I know can not stand but have no escape from.
I would like to believe I am a good person who is a useful community member. As it stands I find this very hard to believe. And like everyone else …. I don’t know why. I can not understand my thought process let alone why everything is upside down and twisted around in my life.
At 11 years […]
Yesterday was my brother’s birthday.
My brother, who would have been 47 years old, committed suicide by hanging himself from his attic trapdoor in the hallway of his house on December 15th, 2008. He left no note, no explanation, no message of any kind. Since his death I’ve had the near-obsession of recreating his life from the scraps that were left. An email here and there (I was able to hack into his computers), a receipt from Home Depot (for rope, plastic zip ties, and a metal pole) that was dated four weeks prior, bills and business files, phone calls and messages on his cellphone, the […]