whats wong with meÂ me evrey thing i see and feel seems to explode in to a ball of self hate and biter rageÂ is there eney thing left for me here in this world with out hope its like i die evrey night i feel dead im sick of the same old shit that piles its self up on my door srowndid in a room one windo a gutar for fuck sake i cant see the floor for all the shit that i cant be botherd to cleen up is this how im going to live my life hevey metel and the cach frase of cant […]
so I don’t know where to even start, I’m going to college this fall. I don’t know if Im excited or not about it… I don’t want to leave my family, I hate them at times and get in fights with them but I still think I will miss them a little even though I’ve been dying to get out for years cause I cant take all there shit. Im bi and I feel like that is going to stop me from making friends and I’m worried about that already. I have horrid anxiety and depression and so thats not helping at all. I haven’t […]
At the beggining of the semester I thought “this semester will be different, I will be able to focus, I will be able to pass the subjects.”
A few months later, and nothing changed. It’s still the same old shit. I haven’t found the strenght to change.
4/5 exams are done. 3 of which I didn’t pass (one of them I didn’t even finish the exam, left halfway through it). My last grade is out. But I am too afraid to go check it. I know I have failed it. But to see that I in fact did, will throw me down for sure. I know […]
Are you afraid of being alone? ‘Cuz I am. I’m lost without you. Are you afraid of leaving tonight? ‘Cuz I am. I’m lost without you….
I have the worst fucking headache ever. 🙁
Today during first lesson, I got this amazing feeling. Y’know, That feeling of ‘everything is going to be okay’? Well, it’s gone now. It’s been replaced with hopeless despair and the slight sickening thoughts of ‘This could all be over’ are slowly creeping into my mind and taking over. I’m afraid of being alone.. I’m really afraid. I don’t want to be alone…
I really want to have something new to say, But I don’t. I have nothing. Same old shit about this broken toy that you’ve all read before.
My OCD is getting worse, A fuck load worse. And […]