ive singlehandedly fucked up my whole life. i was in love with my best friend. we’ve been best friends for years and ive loved him the whole time and then i fucked the whole thing up. because he was being distant and i freaked and stopped talking to him for weeks and then the first time he even texted me all he wanted to say was that he “liked” someone. this gorgeous fucking perfect girl that everyone is in love with and that he will never get. and now everything is messed up and i ruined our friendship and we are both going to the […]
Tag:
Perfect Girl
Ever since I was 12 I wanted a wife, kids, and to be a doctor.  It was the perfect life to me, to have all that happiness as soon as possible.  I’m with the girl of my dreams, the girl who can be the one.  She even use to say she wants all of that…with me.  Starting two months ago though she seems to be ignoring me and not talking to me like she use to.  The anniversary rituals seemed to have stopped.  I went to the hospital today and she was worried and was talking to me more than she has been.  It made […]
Hello to anyone who is reading this. I am confused and I feel so alone, even surrounded by loved ones and co-workers. I am a well-educated 24 year old female. I have a science degree and took too many psychology courses to count, but somehow I still can’t seem to get my head sorted out. I’ve never really suffered from depression or suicidal thoughts until a few months ago and lately it’s all I can seem to think about. I’ve lost interest in all my formerly beloved hobbies and I have lost my appetite. I find it so hard to pay attention in grad school […]
I can’t be what you want me to be.
Im sorry.
I can’t be smart.
I can’t be pretty.
I can’t be open-minded.
I can’t be strong.
I can’t be fierce.
I can’t be what you want me to be.
Im sorry.
I cant be the honor roll student, Mom.
I can’t be the perfect girl, Jeremy.
I can’t be the ‘fun child’, Chris.
I can’t be open-minded, Morgan.
I can’t be your hero, Shanelle.
I can’t be what you want me to be.
I’m sorry.
I’m […]
If you’re wondering what its like to lose your first and only love, your everything, the more than other half of your heart, well this is what its like:
(Sorry, they’re no words for this)
Not only did I lose him.
But I saw him, loving another girl, a perfect girl, a girl ten, no a hundred time prettier than me. I wasn’t with him, I haven’t seen him in months.
But what I did see were the “I love yous” on facebook.
I know. Fucking facebook.
I died. Since then, I have died.
You have no idea how it feels. To watch someone you love, with every fiber in […]