ive gotten fat… im getting better at putting on a smile. ive been dressing nicer and more preppy. ive been laughing more. ive been crying less. ive been arguing more. ive been thinking ab0ut him more. ive been treated worse. ive been told everything will be ok but ive been told that before. ive been keeping everything inside like i used to. im reverting back to the old me. perfect pretty girl. loud and outgoing sarcastic with everything put together. hah what a fucking joke. but i am so good at keeping everything in. ive only been cutting on my wrists so i can hide […]
Well, this is me, Brandilinn, I know its hard to believe that a  girl like me cab have all these  problems going on, well I’m  living proof of it. I really don’t understand why all this shit happens to me. I may have all these things going on, but I do have self confidence. Never have I once thought I wasn’t pretty enough for someone, but I have thought I wasn’t good enough, especially my family. Maybe the reason all of these things happen to me […]
I got invited to have dinner tomorrow with a really pretty girl and her friend. I hope it works out this time. Wish me luck!
Dave
I spend a lot of time wishing I was someone else and I’ve wasted a lot of my life doing so. Sometimes I think of myself but a better version of myself, better looking, more talented, an ideal social and home life. Other times I daydream of myself as a completely different person; wether it’s a sociable gay male living in California or pretty blonde city girl living in London, UK. I constantly see people and think ‘I’d give anything to be you’.
I can’t stop and it scares me because it’s not healthy and I’m afraid that I’m always going to hate who I am.
I […]
Tonight I have thought about driving over a bridge, drowning in my bathtub or just slitting my wrists with broken glass. It’s a disease. Suicide is something that takes you over and makes you weaker and weaker.
Strange that today I am willing to take my life when I remember pulling through all the difficulties, I am still alive but it’s not that I have to just keep on going through and surviving through yet another hard time but that I have to remember and re-live the pain of when I first held a bottle of pills. It used to be that nobody knew, that behind […]
Hi My name is Nikki… I am 15 years old and I have been cutting for a very long time.. I know what it is like to hurt and feel nothing but pain and misery. I have lost so many people to death and You know it is not fun.. I am not that skinny pretty girl at all. I lost a guy I was in love with to a person who felt the need to shoot and kill him. I felt the pain of loosing my best friend to a person who hit him with a car. I felt the pain to my grandmother […]
I don’t know. I’m suppose to be happy, I’m finally getting a full makeover this week on Thursday and Friday for saturday’s prom. i always wanted to be pretty, pretty enough for guys in school to stop saying how ugly i am behind my back or to my face. Pretty enough for me to have a guy look at me and say wow your pretty. Or at least pretty enough for me to actually have my first boyfriend, or even my first kiss. I want to be able to walk down the hallways with confidence and not  with my head down. I know that I’m […]
My parents say I want to call attention. That the way I dress demands attention. That I embarrassed them. I don’t try to. I just can’t be myself. I see myself In the mirror and all I see is a fat lard. I hate my skin tone, my eyes, my hair, my body! I hate it all! So I try to make it better! I try to hide my fat body under layers of clothes. I hide my face under make up! I hide my ugly untamed frizzy shit colored hair under dye. I change how I look! And only when I change it I […]