I actually really want someone to punch me. Like when I’m feeling really frustrated and angry I just wish someone would hurt me. I want to feel the solid strike of justice hitting my body, the pain rippling through my body. Punishment for my sins.
Tag:
Punch
A gut pull drag on me
Into the chasm gaping we
Mirrors multi reflecting this
Between spunk stained sheet
And odourous whim
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OlQU_7YU6HI
Calmer eye flick shudder within
Assist me to walk away in sin
Where is the string that Theseus laid
Find me out this labyrinth place
Yin and Yang lumber punch
Go taste a tart then eat my lunch
And force my slender thin and lean
In this solemn place of fill wetting dreams
Of black matted lace and pregnant cows
As life maps out onto my brow
The card is lowered in index turn
Into my filing cabinet
Hemispheres burn
I don’t know what it is about Saturdays, but my fiance develops this overwhelming cruelty on those days and tonight. Last saturday I spent the night in our closet because he punched me in the nose and didn’t let me leave. Tonight I cowered in a corner while he yelled at me that I’m ugly, stupid, a shitty excuse for a girlfriend, that my attitude sucks, and that I need to apologize to his friends for acting so “embarrassing” tonight. I got upset over a video game we were playing. I admit that it’s childish but I didn’t throw things around the room, punch walls, […]
I just dont know why i cant get the words out of my mind. I cant forget anything. I remember every single word or name i was called. I remember every punch. I still have the feeling of being terrified every day to do anything and being worried ill do it wrong and disappoint someone. My mind i slowly killing me and its winning. I cant fight for much longer. I hate more when i don’t know a answer to a question. i cant handle being so weak and stupid. I hate when anybody is disappointed in me. I hate me. I cry when […]
Why can’t she see that I’m not alright?
Why can’t she see that I need her?
Why can’t she see that I hate myself?
Why can’t she see how I feel about her?
More importantly, why do I have to feel this way about her?
Why do I have to love her?
Do you know how often I hear people talk bad about gays, lesbian, and bisexuals? I listen to people go on about how it’s “Immoral” or “wrong” and I just have to sit there, clenching my fists, wanting to punch them all in the face. Because if they knew. If they really knew, then I would never be accepted. […]
Im pissed off with my so called life. I have no one, not one person who calls me. not one “real” friend! I have come to the conclusion that no one gives a shit. Most days i wonder around town aimlessly with my son and its as if im a ghost no one talks to me i feel so alone. And them false people who pretend they give a shit just makes me want to punch there horrible faces in. My boyfriend doesnt understand how i feel i tell him i feel suicidal and hes like you’ll be ok!! I feel like theres no hope […]
Do I have a sign saying “shes vunerable, take advantage” on my back?
by lonelyinside
written by lonelyinside
This crap is getting really old. My new boyfriend, the one afore mentioned, turns out to be nothing that i was expecting under pressure.
The story starts on Thursday after school. Im texting him and his ‘best friend’ takes his phone and starts a convo with me like she knows me. Being the polite girl i am, i keep talking to her. She then tells me she has feelings for my bf and so my friend takes my phone and politely tells her(under me) that there needs to be boundaries cuz were dating. This girl starts trippin on me and i leave with my best […]
It’s always a little disheartening to watch your favored boxer slip and move only to step into a hard punch that otherwise could have been avoided if he had done…nothing. Â He would have been better off had he not moved at all. Â And so it goes with life. Â What is the right question to ask here, if there is one at all? Â Is it important to take risks and repeatedly fail, with the very real risk of conditioning yourself to accept it? Â Or was this a mistake, misjudgment or worse- sign of weak character?
Over the past four years of my life, I’ve looked back at […]
I was at that muslim cemetery you were buried in, which is a little heart wrenching because you are without a doubt athiest. I found some kind of ritual you can do to bring a loved one back for a little while, it was hell to do, but it was possible and I did it. You came back but it wasn’t the same. You were happier, and more at peace, rather you were still your condescending self. Just not as much. We talked for a while, and I felt so much better. Your family members and some friends came to the gravesite. Some could see […]
So far I’ve posted story’s of love and death. Here’s just one more about love.
So for the longest time I was in love with this boy, if you’ve seen my other stories this is before Zach, but his name was Noah.
I know for sure, he won’t be reading this, or at least know who I am so it’s safe to use his name. But anyway on topic, Noah was what every girl wanted he was cute, taller than me, a good kisser, popular, athletic, captain of the football team, a slight accent, and a total gentlemen. He was just amazing. I fell for him, hard.
And […]
By:EmoCookie
Boom
Bam
Slam
No one heard the pain that I believe I desever
Slice
Dice
That is th price that I pay for myself
Spray
Snif
The way I can take myself from this world to be happy for just a second
Slap
Crack
Punch
Have nothing left
Get something someone can’t take from me
Safty pins
No longer come safe for me
Blade box cutters
No longer are for boxes
For my arm is now the box
And the blade […]
I honestly have no idea how I am, who I am or what I’m doing. It’s difficult to have your whole family think you’re an attention seeker because you cut yourself and because you’re depressed and were suicidal. It hurts so much to let people you care about so much down. I hate myself more then anything ever. It’s so hard. When I say it’s so hard I hate myself more for being so weak and pathetic. I’m 16. I have grown up bullied, hit and at one point I was sexually assaulted which I very rarely talk about. I have a boyfriend now, his […]
hey guys just joined up, my story is about my failure to die.
it doesn’t begin in any fancy way, just with a girl, why is it always a girl? it’s been 10 years since i fell in love with her, both of us were nine years old at the time. but there never seemed like a time for us. for years we remained friends, best friends, but as close as we were it just never happened, i could never say how i felt. then she started seeing those guys, just in it for her looks and her body. she was clever enough never to […]
so the ***** is at a friends house..YIPPEE!(: had the night to myself. the first night in weeks i gotta walk around the house not worying what my sister would do to me. normaly, i leave a room and she screams. the other day she beat me with a hanger for stepping out of her room to change a song on utube im supposed to watch her clean her room not focus on music…anyways she comes home in a few hours…DAMN but a plus side: mom outa the house today (***** is nicer when its just dad home). i wish my morning can last forever […]
Spent my Saturday night curled up in the foetal position, on a couch in the spare room, interrupted by the occasional self-inflicted punch in the head when it got too much. Sleep was elusive. What little sleep I did find was peppered with dreams, such as the one where a train was stopped at a railroad crossing and I decided to sit under the train and wait for it to move. Then, there was the one where I was back at school, only the HR Manager at my work was the Deputy Principal, and she said she was really worried about me. I had to […]
I’m giving up on going for jasmine and broke it off with her. Not going to talk to her for a while. Probably going to go apeshit sometime soon with my depression. I’m worried, I’m considering myself unstable because my depression may suddenly kick itself up a notch suddenly. Bracing for it… Thanks one_day for giving me that good ole punch to the face my naive mind needed, now I might spiral out of control, and nickname thanks too and I’m sory if i snapped at you -_-
Tonight we had our own “fight club†for the first time. I got the text invitation just as I was thinking about swallowing all the pills in my medicine cabinet…it seemed like a nice alternative to a suicide attempt, so I agreed. Call them odd for emulating such an idea, but it beats the hell out of pumping iron at the tool cage on the ASU Tempe campus, I guess. There were only six of us behind the abandon furniture store across from the tracks, but it was more than enough to get things rolling. The energy was immense…like doing lines of blow at the […]
Hey, I’m a 17 year old dude looking for some advice from normal people. I feel hopeless. I am a misanthrope and hate pretty much everyone. I have no hope for the human’s survival. We kill everything we come across, destroy the world given to us, and even kill our own. I’ve been trying to look on the bright side and be an optimist, then I realize there are none. I do not feel close to my family and do not wish to speak to them. I have plenty of friends but I do not feel like speaking to them about this either. Everyday seems […]
Well, this is it. I am nearing the end. I can feel it coming. I am so traumatised I have trouble even identifying ‘this’ as ‘it’. It would be more accurate to say that was that, or it was that, but never this is it. So I’ll start again:
It was that. fwiw. A lifetime assault on a human being who never got up from the first punch.
Sorry, that’s no good either. I’m usually okay finding words. It’s probably a measure of how frightened I am that words hurt too. I cannot pick up a ringing telephone. It has got to the point where I have […]