i had talent. people would compliment me on it all the time. i don’t know why i didn’t pursue it. I was afraid of of failure. Now i am a failure, at a job i absolutely hate, hardly have any money. I try to imagine that i would have failed either way, but i wish i had just tried. But i didn’t and now im stuck here. It’s worse having wasted talent than no talent at all because if you aren’t good at something then it’s no harm no foul. But it sucks knowing you were good at something and you didn’t pursue it because […]
Tag:
Regrets
Do you ever look back at your life and just instantly break down in tears? I am 18 years old, and in all of those 18 years I have done nothing productive for myself or for this world. I never tried in school, I really just barely got by. I never focused on building strong friendships or relationships, or at least never succeeded in them. I played soccer for most of my life, but was never great. I like to sing and play guitar, but I’m mediocre at best. I never excelled at anything I did, i just existed. The part that frustrates me […]
my regrets are what bother me the most so I figured I’d list them.
**** coming out and talking about these certain regrets in order their listed is suppose to help me, I welcome your thoughts and don’t mind name calling because, well you’ll see.****
1- lying that one specific lie
2-hurting who I hurt
3- being who I am
4-trying to die at the wrong time for people
5- having to take medicine to hide the pain
6- letting people mistake my cry for help as attention seeking
7-saying I regret cutting
8- said I was okay but I wasn’t
9- not thinking clear
10- not getting away when I should have
I try to live myself now with no regrets but I have one from the past that I just can’t get over. I left my wife while she was 9 months pregnant and asked for a divorce. I’ve always been apart of my child’s life but I can’t get over leaving her, I never should have done it. When she’s nice to me I am on top of the world. When she’s mean or ignores me it puts me in the deepest depression. It has been over 7 years and I just can’t get over it, I try. I’ve talked to psychologist and been out […]
Well fuck its been a while since I last posted something on here. Just another dose of disappointment and frustration, have no other way to vent but post it up. Because no one likes that sorta shit up on facebook! LOL
ANYWAYS, how is everyone doing? Great I hope, but by the looks of all these post. Not looking too flash atm huh? Don’t you wish you could just turn back time & change things only because you’ve disappointed yourself for the decisions that you’ve made and you don’t want anyone else to know? Yes, no…maybe? haha its is a terrible feeling, especially if you’re the […]
I told a group of friends about my attempt which I totally regretted and want to move forward from. Â I told a few people and everything was okay. Â I made the mistake of telling more people that I respect and go to for advice… but they don’t know me as well. Â Anyways, I now feel like a leper. Â I can tell that certain people don’t want me around their families any more and that they are uncomfortable when they are around me. Â How are you supposed to move forward if opening up has so many negative consequences?
Let’s just honestly say, that many children’s creation upon this Earth was a mistake.  In several ways. People tend to deny these things, this entire post perhaps, but they avert their eyes when they do.  Then they rapidly change topic, start accusations of something you yourself have done, but they twist it around and make it sound as if they had no part in it….had no part in being the very reason why you did that (whatever it may be). And when you deny it, of being the sole factor in a certain exchanging of words, in a response, or an action, they lose what […]
although most here are in the same boat as me… a daily struggle with life and happiness…. I wonder if there is any one here who has come to the point of saying they are glad they did not go through with suicide, and it all gets better.
My question is …Â as you are now in the point in your life where it is all better…. and you are glad you are still alive…. if you knew you had to suffer for another 5, 10, 15 years to get to this point of happiness…. would you still say it is worth it, sticking it out?
It’s […]
I am not sure of how ,people speaking about a form on how to kill one’s self. Is anyone listening to this shit. If you want to kill your self then pickup the weapon of choice and use it. That’s if you have the mine set. Just do it. Death is the end to us all, anyway. What different does it make on when your going to die some day. We all know this right , yet we all face that last road block ,you know who I am talking about yeah him. The MAN and his book ,it has been pounded […]
My life is a big piece of wrongful humor.
I wish I could dig my regrets deep down, break my sorrows, and let go of my sins.
Who’s that uncredited monster that dwells behind the scenes of my life? I will find you and kill you.
There is no such thing as routine. There is regular disorder.
Everything is possible… Until a choice has been made.
It won’t be what can’t be.
Forgive the truth for its cruelty.
Are you frightened? I’ve got a cup of pleasure for you.
Things, which make you cry, should reverse.
They are laughing, again. May they choke on their laugh.
Destroy all, destroy all or nothing.
Gives pain to those that are weak and can come out stronger. Endure and take as a reminder that the earthly ties of anguish are still knitted, and no human can untie what was tied by a supreme being. only the spirit and hand of it who laid the blocks and keyholes to that castle has the right to stand and move in it.
I wake to the sound of sadness and betrayal from a thought far far above. Understanding is all I will never get, actions turn to regrets. I lay, in a room, the ceiling is a dark night sky hidden from shooting stars. […]
I have died in my dreams a hundred times. I have tried to kill myself several times in my waking life, which seems more like a living nightmare to me. Â In all the 20 years I’ve lived I haven’t done a single good thing. All I have is regrets, though when I come to rethink the steps I took and the choices I made there doesn’t seem to be another way I could have gone.
I have been a complete failure since my childhood. But back then I took life much easier because my childhood activities took me away from all the bad thoughts and my […]
Rapidly spiraling
down,
down,
always downward.
Never up.
Envisioning in my mind
of blood running down my arm
my face
my stomach
my legs & ankles.
Feelings of nothingness.
Wanting to cry, throw up,
and turn away with guilt and regret.
Suicidal Tendencies come forth,
beckoning and pushing me away
from the temporary refuge
I had inexplicably found in dreams.
Regrets pile up around me
little post-it notes on the walls
covered in despair and insanity.
Incomprehensible thoughts running through my head
screaming in agony I bleed
scarlet rivulets create a river of inconsistencies.
Hello everyone.
My name is Belle. I have never been on here before but I’ve been observing Miss Kyu for a while and I decided  why not try it out just for the hell out of it? Seems fun enough. I am miss kyu’s darker and more hated side. She hates me. Haha. But she has no choice but to want and need me. Where else will she push all her regrets and negative emotions? Today is her birthday, she hates her birthday. So it’s a day where she runs away and lets me out for some fresh air. All day, both of us have been […]
I am not perfect. I have many regrets. I have the scars to remind me of my mistakes. I knew a boy in middle school. He was 10 and had beautiful hair. When we were in high school he overdosed. Six months ago, I went to visit my family. I saw my uncle as I was getting ready to go swimming with cousins. He wanted to talk but I told him I had to go. I took a picture with him, went swimming, came back home. A week later he hung himself. 5 days ago my friend put a gun to her head and killed […]
I really don’t understand myself. I just got back from my Prom, and I have to say it wasn’t as bad as I expected, but that’s because I had no expectations at all! Anyway, for some of it, I was really really happy and I danced and laughed and had a lovely time. However, for other parts, I just sat staring into nothing and feeling numb and wanting to die. This also happened whilst I was on the dancefloor, and I just stayed there awkwardly dancing and wondering how easy it would be to just do it at that exact moment, like jump from the […]
First of all I would like to point out I left school about a year ago and I have been looking for a job and getting nowhere, had a couple of interviews but had no luck with that.
I live in a tiny village where I dont know many people so it means getting family to drive me 11 miles to town so I can meet my mates. Only problem is all my mates are guys, I don’t get on with girls. So because im only really interested in getting drunk Its usually with a few guys every week along with my older brother who […]
what’s the point of being alive ?
chase after futile things, do whatever it takes to not think much of the triviality of life ?
give society the power and right to tell you how to feel, think, judge .. tell you how to live ?
hide yourself behind appearances to appear better than the next (wo)man ?
help people so you can tell yourself you’re making the world a better place ? (no offense to therapists, healers etc since they’re helpful to some)
I’m gonna give this world the opportunity to surprise me, to have me thinking: “wow it’s truly worth being here” and believe it
if I haven’t changed […]
To begin, I am fairly misanthropic and disenfranchised due to humanity’s impact on nature and the wildlife that inhabit (or did inhabit in many cases) this once beautiful planet, Â how society is in general, whether it be the intolerance and hate that monotheistic religions have spread for generations (as well as how religious teachings dominate our political and legal systems despite all of the blatant problems that arise from it), the general lack of concern for our irreversible impacts, our horrible justice systems, our spiraling out of control dependency on technology, etc, etc…. but I also share the German philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer’s views on misanthropy […]
(Written with a shattered suicidal heart)
If I could go back in time
to when you asked me out
I’d look at you and say
of course, without a doubt
The kids at school can laugh
the kids at school can stare
but they just dont know
the love of ours is rare
I don’t know what to say
and I don’t know what to do
I don’t know how to tell
I want my 1st kiss with you
I wish that you would hold me
in your arms at night
wrapped around my heart
wrapped aroung my sides
I only wish that you could know
all the things I […]
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