I think what I need to do is just get away from my family for a while. We are truly messed up and dysfunctional. It’s like my adoptive parents go out of their way to get kids with disorders and mental problems. Maybe they really are kind hearted people and try to help kids like that…. but what do I know? All I can say for sure is that on our house alone we have a kleptomaniac with anxiety, an addict with depression and a shitload of other shit, a girl who has a sailors mouth(who I personally think is a sociopath…seriously), and two other normal […]
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Shitload
I’m 15. At this age, most people have lots of close friends and go out every weekend and have a shitload of fun.
Then there’s me.
I feel so lonely and I can’t shake this feeling. I have some friends in school, but no one I actually go out with. I used to have three best friends, now I only have one.
My best friend left me. He was the one that said he’d never let me go. I don’t even think he realises how much I need him by my side. I can’t live without him, he was always the one that saved me.
I […]
Whether that be through a botched surgery or adverse effect to a medication? Â For me personally my life was ruined by my dentist who removed my mercury fillings without using proper precautions and exposed me to a shitload of mercury and basically destroyed my brain. Â I then got tested for my mercury levels but for some reason they showed up at “normal” levels whatever that means. Â I know I’m poisoned though so psychologists/psychiatrists called me delusional and gave me the diagnosis of schizophrenia. Â My life is over and has been for quite some time. Â Is this all there is to life?
Everyone’s annoying and out to get you. Your friends are disrespectful and unappreciative little cunts who don’t give a shit about what you’re going trough (the only reason they ask ,,what’s wrong” is purely curiosity) and the people around you stopped appreciating you a long time ago.Â
You’re an ugly little ***** who no guy will ever date, fuck or marry.
You’re not doing well in school or work ergo you deserve to die because you’re a useless member of this society.Â
By wanting to kill yourself, talking about depression and anxiety, having anger fits and complaining makes you either boring or a scary individual that nobody wants […]
It’s been quite a long time since I’ve been on here,
Life still continues to pass me by. I met a girl who I have been involved with for around 9 months now.
I have learnt a lot about her.. Heck I even love her. I didn’t think I would meet anyone again at least not after the relationship I was in prior..
She’s changed from the girl I originally met back in December. She isn’t the girl I fell in love with..
She dismisses my feelings like they are just disposable. She’s sent my heart into a deep abyss, of darkness, anger and hate.
I have so much uncertainty […]
I am so depressed right now that it almost hurts to breathe. I just want to curl up in a ball and die. I want somebody to hold me so I can cry o. Their shoulder like a baby. But I can’t cry. I have a dam built up inside me to keep my emotions from showing. It has held up well so far, but dams break, and I’m scared of what will happen when my dam breaks.
Nobody understands me. Nobody knows how I really feel. No one knows how depressed I am or that I am constantly having to deal […]
I posted something the other day, but it really didn’t explain my ‘history’ as people are calling it.
Hey. I’m Adrienne. People call me Addie. I’m almost 18. I have a great family (except my dad). I put a shitload of pressure on myself. I have been cutting myself for about 6 years. It got pretty hard-core during the last 3 years. I don’t do it to feel alive, per se; I do it to punish myself for anything I can think of, or if I just feel depressed. I have attempted suicide twice, both times failing (obviously). I have been seriously considering doing it again, […]
I just read a definition for suicide calling it a cry for help. It really annoyed me, because in my opinion it’s the exact opposite. Suicide happens when we feel there is no help to be given whatsoever, suicide is when we can’t help ourselves and can’t be helped by anyone else. Suicide is deciding that we’ve had enough of this fucking world and don’t want any help staying in it. The only way suicide could possibly be a cry for help would be if it was a purposely messy and obvious attempt, or if the person told a shitload of people their plans, or […]
Its been a while since ive written here, I’m writing this on a notepad on the bus but I assume a lot has changed, I’d like to meet some of the new guys here.
But, anyway.. Reason for posting, it’s not really so much about me, there’s just a shitload of stress happening to people around me. My best friend is having the shittiest year at school right now and I feel really bad for her, which is nothing I’d be doing a year ago, but ive gotten different too. I guess life has been gotten more boring and I’ve woken up and started caring about […]