It’s a struggle having to hide my depression for fear of being judged. I feel like most people wouldn’t be able to understand depression which is understandable because how can you understand what you haven’t gone through? but I feel that because I feel as though I’m going to be judged by other people I’ve become very closed-off and that has played a part in some of my problems today like why I don’t like meeting people, why I don’t trust people, why I have anxiety and self-esteem issues,etc. . It really hurts me that I feel like I can’t be open about my depression […]
Tag:
Taking The Time
I just wanted to say thank you for taking the time to read this post.
My whole life, I have felt two things: loneliness and the hatred towards myself.
Why do I hate myself?
I am not smart. I am not good looking. I am not talented in anything at all.
I really am useless.
I have classmates telling me, I can’t do anything right; leaving me out of the social life. No matter how hard I tried to fit in, I end up seeing pitch black of nothing, my existence shouldn’t exist in the first place.
I have read a numerous amount of quotes motivating me to never give up, […]
I just wanna be happy man. Lifes gotta be so hard doesnt it? ..hmm got so many things to get off my chest by just cant seem to put them to words.. hmm.. like it seems every corner i turn theres just dissapointment. .you actually get up and try do something bout your depression then u get thrown right back in the water due to the world being so F*****. noone wants to help.. evan then what are they ment to do? hand me the winning lottery ticket or something? everymorning i wake up wondering if this will be the day i do it, just […]
And I’ve lost, I took a gamble and tried getting my campus involved for the first time in the university elections. However personally I have won! I’ve spoke to 1000’s of people, taking the time to explain what a students union is and connected with people that have been unrepresented, neglected and forgotten for too long. The guy that won was a unknown, I am so glad that someone new to the Union won it!
Today as I write this I am going fail my dissertation, 40 credits wasted, and without a miracle 4 years of university wasted. Its not all been bad, at least I’ve […]
For anyone who read my earlier post about not getting into college, I got accepted because it was a mistake at their end. I thought my life had new meaning and purpose…… Oh how wrong I was. I haven’t felt this depressed and suicidal for months. I am so paranoid around all the other students. I don’t fit in. I probably could if I really tried but I’m a wimp. I’ve simply had enough. I’ve tried so many things to turn my life around and they all end up the same. I was extremely close to stepping in front of a car today but I […]
It was my job to keep my phone by my side…my best friend AKA my brother made it clear that he would call ME, if anyone, if he contemplated suicide. At 9;43PM May 8, 2010, I called him and left a message about the Mother’s Day celebration the following day. In a heavy sleep, I missed a phone call at 6AM from a restricted number. Come 8AM, there was a knock at my door. My girlfriend (I was in a gay relationship at the time) answered the door and came back to bed to inform me that my mother and aunt were there. First thought-SHIT, […]
i have posted this before… but i want to help. if you are truely thinking about suicide please read this… it will only take a second and you can go on from there…
hello, i am here today to tell you about my site… you see, i grew up in a family where my mom and dad were fighting constantly, my mom cheated on my dad and that just lead to a down fall… anyhow, when i was five, my mom left my dad and i went to live with her, i never knew my dad growing up which could have helped me as my mom […]
i have posted this before, but i really think this is the perfect site to help people on… so here we go.
hello, i am here today to tell you about my site… you see, i grew up in a family where my mom and dad were fighting constantly, my mom cheated on my dad and that just lead to a down fall… anyhow, when i was five, my mom left my dad and i went to live with her, i never knew my dad growing up which could have helped me as my mom was an alcoholic drug dealer… and well that should say it […]
hello, i am here today to tell you about my site… you see, i grew up in a family where my mom and dad were fighting constantly, my mom cheated on my dad and that just lead to a down fall… anyhow, when i was five, my mom left my dad and i went to live with her, i never knew my dad growing up which could have helped me as my mom was an alcoholic drug dealer… and well that should say it all.
i grew up hating myself, woundering what I did to make my parents split, and believing my dad did not love […]