As I feel closer and closer to the end i have a sense of happiness and excitement for some strange reason. I don’t know if it’s the thought of leaving everything behind and not having to suffer any longer or what awaits me on the other side. Last night I sat in my room looking at old family photos and it brought a smile to my face of all those happy memories but now so distant and forgotten. I’m just not cut out for this world never have and never will be, so what’s the problem in me just ending it all now? I have nothing to show for nothing to love and no where to go. She was my everything, my one and only, my soul mate, best friend my rock, no one could ever replace you.. All just slipped away, but that’s what you get when you let your heart win.