ALL i want to do is eat and die….right now. i want to eat and eat and i try to squash down the feelings and it never helps and i am just plain TIRED of it all. i am useless. 🙁
Why?
I am tired of asking the same fucking question
I am tired of smiling when inside i feel like i am dying
I am tired of the fucking bullshit
I am tired of lies
Don’t i deserve the truth??
Why does everybody seem to love screaming at me?
Fuck
Why did i have to be born??
Urrgh
Bone crushing pain i feel everyday
Tired of this cycle repeating
Tired of begging for help
Tired of feeling alone
Tired of myself
Tired of not being enough
Tired of making eveyone else happy
Tired of being left out
Tired of hoping for nothing
Tired of dreamless […]
I just want my life back.. Swim team, varsity soccer captain, cheer squad, student council… A perfect boyfriend, and perfect friends. I had a life, and an amazing future to look forward to.
The thing is, I was amazing at faking it. I put on a smile and didn’t let anyone ever see it fade. And now too much has happened and I’m exhausted from lying and being someone I can’t be anymore.
I want my mom back.
I want to be that blissfully happy teenager who had no worries. Instead of this depressed anxiety-ridden maniac that walks around like the living dead. I might be alive, but […]
I’m tired of feeling like this every day. I keep waiting for the right time, that will hurt my family the least. In between birthdays. Far away from home. I wish it was simpler, that I could make my choice and fuck all the consequences. But I have this huge guilt about leaving my friends and family, especially my brothers and my mom.
I have had many failed attempts and this has hurt my family. I want to ensure everything is successful next time. I think obsessively about methods and timing, around 10-30 times a day. I’m on anti depressants but they don’t help. The only […]
Everyone around this fucking ***** sitting here thinking they know what’s best for me and trying to tell me how to live MY ducking life!! I just wanna get the fuck up and move as far away as I can and never fucking look back!! Tired of all the bull shit!!! Fuck this!!
Just tired and alone. No reason to do anything. No love, no life, no hope. Nothing.
It’s back. In all honesty it’s never been truly gone. Always peeking through the windows, shoving a hand through the door to wave hi while I try to hold the door closed. Sometimes it might come in for a bit but I’ve always been able to kick it out and closeclose the door before it brings its really unwanted friend. Wherever depression is, it’s only a matter of time before the blackhole comes. This time I haven’t been able to kick the depression away. I thought depression was closed out but now realize it’s been in my presence for the last 3 months and I’ve […]
I’m such a fucking idiot.
I’m tired of not being able to manage my moods.
I’m sick of the fact that I have zero social skills,
and can’t really “read” people.
I’m tired of pills that don’t really fix anything.
I’m tired of not having the balls to kill myself.
(I’ve come pretty close though)
I’m tired of doctor’s who think they can heal me.
(They can’t)
I’m tired of the voices I hear, which I’m convinced are demons.
I’m tired of people not believing they’re real.
I’m sick of the fact that they’ll never stop until I’m dead.
I still believe in God.
I still think I’m going to heaven (but not certain anymore)
I sometimes don’t think […]
With each day gets harder and harder. What am I doing? Why is this happening to me? Why do I constantly cry and in constant pain? Everyday I wake up feeling worthless and pathetic. Sometimes I feel like is living even an option for me at all? I have so much love to give but the ones that I hold dear to my heart just doesn’t seem to notice how much pain I’m in. Lately I’ve been contemplating a permanent sleep. If I don’t wake up the next morning, will they realize that I’m actually gone? Or will they just ignore me like usual. I’m […]
I can’t go through this anymore, being lied to, betrayed, and hurt by.I’m tired of wanting to not be myself of hurting myself. I contemplate if I ceased to exist how long it would take anyone to notice, well if anyone ever did. When you are alone and don’t have anyone who truly loves you its hard. I can’t be strong anymore because I know its not worth it. No one actually wants to be with me for something other than their personal gain.
I really just don’t see a reason to keep on going. There is absolutely no meaning to my life, I just feel so pointless. It’s so hard to get out of bed now, I don’t want to go to school, I don’t want to eat. I just want to stop being because it’s gotten so hard to drag my feet. I feel like I’m carrying a thousand tons on my back. I keep dropping things but the weight keeps growing heavier and heavier. I can’t seem to find a way to lighten my steps. I drop pound after pound but I still feel so heavy. […]
About two years ago I started down the path to a really horrible place. I had developed a pretty serious eating disorder, I was harming myself, and worst of all I’d almost completely stopped sleeping. I became extremely unmotivated and generally didn’t want to do anything. I couldn’t find a meaning to life, I saw no purpose to even existing because nothing I did ever made me happy. I tried so hard to be happy but nothing could change the horrible feelings inside of me. About 8 months ago things started to get better, I was actually doing really well and I felt like a […]
I’m tired of pretending to be ok. I’m tired of not feeling well. I’m tired of lying. I’m tired of feeling crazy. I’m tired of disappointing people. I’m tired of being sad. I’m tired of being anxious. I’m tired of being embarrassed. I don’t know what to do. I’m miserable.
I’m tired of life. Tired of obligations, tired of this world with its rules, its human society. I made a lot of mistakes in my life. And wasted a lot of chances to become successful or to fulfill my dreams. I regret a lot. Yea, if only I could revert time back, while keeping my current memory, lol.
Sure, reverting time would be great. But I don’t really care about all this now. The only things that keep me going these days are my hobbies. And my mom. She did really a lot for me. But I’m tired, I really am.
Almost every night I go to […]
im tired of being tired im exhausted at this point il never be perfect or beautiful il always feel like an inconvenience and i no im stronger than this but right now i dont have the energy to fight this dark negativity
I Fucking hate you. I really do. Because I can’t tell you what goes on in my head. I can’t. If I told you that I can picture myself painting the most beautiful mural I’ve ever seen as I splatter someone’s brain across a wall, youd never speak to me again. Youd never see me the same. If I told you that I love you in the same breath, you would fucking hate me. But it’s only natural to hate a sociopath. Right? […]
Things like these are always hard to type aren’t they? Or maybe I’m just awkward, heh.
My name is Daniel, but I tend to go by Danny. I’m 17 years old about to turn 18 in May but I’ve come to the conclusion that I don’t want to keep living. Why? That’ s a hard question to answer and I don’t want to bore you with stories but I’ve become really tired. Many think that 17 years isn’t long at all but in my eyes it’s like a century, not that I’m calling people older than me ridiculously old but that’s just how I feel , ya know?
I’ve […]
I don’t belong here. . . My brother is constantly going on about how he’s depressed and that apparently means that I should do things for him and he tries to make me feel guilty saying things like how our dad (who adopted and raised him) likes me more than him and treats me like a princess and just makes his life miserable when all he ever does is sit in his room and play video games. . . and I just moved in with my dad and his family last summer and its the first time in my life I’ve had him in my […]
Yet again the voices in my head have won another night.