scars of life

I know I’m gonna end it soon, just not sure what day… before all this trouble I was in I was living a good life. I was happy then 1 night being drunk and stupid I lost it, and end up in jail with 4 assualt charges…. 8 charges total. so I feel I pretty much ruined my life. cuz after trial il be going to jail for 2years. fuck that. ‘ my family is worried about me bcuz they know I’m suicidal, and since I stabbed my self 6 times in the neck 3 years ago. I should have fucking died that time, but my sisters bf walked in my room while I was doing it. paramedics came just in time, another 30 seconds later would be dead.  now I’m left with a 5 inch scar on my neck from surgery…. well I think hanging is my method need to get it right this time. fuck this life!