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Music and stuff (pointless, dont read)

  March 19th, 2019 by PatheticMale

Hey.  If you guys remember I said I wont post anymore because it only makes it worse for me but this doesnt count coz its not a rant. Anyway sorry for wasting up space here with non-suicide related stuff. I am trying to change my life for  better now. It is really slow and so far nothing has really changed on the outside, I am still addicted to weed, but I feel like my mindset is gradually  getting better. I try to push myself out of my comfort zone, even was on a few dates for the first time of my life. It didnt really …

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1

i tried and i dont think anything matters

  March 19th, 2019 by lostcase

so i tried because i was so tired and i couldnt care less about anything else, i dont give a fuck weather anyone would be sad or mad, i texted goodbye two friends and wrote the rest letters, one tried to stop me but i told them this is what has to be done. so after cutting many stupid cuts on my stupid leg i looked at my arm and got too weak to cut it open so i opened the pill bottle and ate it all. i was already dizzy from blood loss and fainted on the bathroom floor. a tiny while later i …

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2

I’m going to die

  March 18th, 2019 by edrudd

I got completely impotent after stoping pristiq and lamictal and taking 1 invega injection. PSSS MIXED WITH ANTIPSYCHOTIC POISON. I am 18 and I was murdered by psychiatric. I had a life… a fucking future… I can’t even have an erection with viagrs my dick is dead. And I’m not even depressed . I’m not feeling depressed that makes it difficult to kill myself. I’m not depressed but I am being tortured 24/7 that’s worst than being depressed.
This is me. A guy with a good future who have to kill himself because he was castrated by greedy pill makers. I should never have taken any …

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4

Who Am I?

  March 18th, 2019 by Insomnia disaster

Who am I you may ask? How can I tell you who I am if I don’t even know myself?
I don’t know who I am today
I know who I used to be
I miss her
Her smile and determination
Her drive and passion
Here naivety
Her eyes filled with energy
That girl could dream a dream though
They were so vivid, colorful and plentiful
Today I dream the same dream over and over again, only it’s a nightmare now
It always ends in unforgiving darkness as I realize that I’m imprisoned. Chained and weighed down by the mighty unrelenting force of my own mind
But she is gone, she died a long time ago
Right now …

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4

The social experiment

  March 18th, 2019 by awis

It’s hard to actually commit suicide. Before we do that, we try to use out all the resources to prevent our own deaths. A few weeks ago, when I’ve became sucidal, I’ve became genuinely affraid of the seriousness of my intents. I reminded myself of those stories, where a depressed person gets to be saved just because they decided to confess and reach out to someone. So, I’ve decided to do the same. I was looking for a sign to give me one faint reason not to kill myself. Guess what… Yeah, you’ve guessed right.

I was so alone and desperate that I used to hang …

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0

a beast has just ripped out my heart

  March 18th, 2019 by an_old_child

you can skip the first paragraph

i used to be suicidal some years ago, but i tried really hard and now i’m actually successful. i’m a computer engineering student and my grades are so good that i can go for masters degree without entrance exam. i’m a digital artist too and i’m currently an intern in a game development studio. it’s what i always wanted. although having to study hard and working at the same time is sometimes overwhelming, but it’s good. it makes me feel productive. it’s cool. i also actually managed losing one of my good …

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0

Better

  March 18th, 2019 by careforme

Last we talked you all found out I lost my baby and life was really hard for me. Well I found out that i may never be able to have kids and if I do i’d be at high risk not what i wanted to hear but hey who knows maybe something great will happen. Anyway I told my dad about my depression and how there were times i wanted to die or start self harming and he understood a little and is trying to understand my situation better he said he’d get me help if i needed it my family is actually being their …

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1

Done

  March 18th, 2019 by unknownsoldier

That’s a fucking wrap. I’m done with this life.

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1

Why am I still here?

  March 18th, 2019 by strawberrycrown

I honestly don’t even know why I am still here. I look back and think of how many times I have been up at night crying, sometimes for not much reason at all. I look back and wonder why I have been so ready to get yet haven’t yet. I don’t have the energy to be here anymore. I dont have the social capability to function here anymore. It has taken me too many rough patches to realise that there is nothing keeping me back here anymore. I just know that I can’t handle being here for another hour longer.

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0

another

  March 18th, 2019 by Dungeon

this is exhausting
what am i supposed to do
honestly i feel closer than i have ever been , yet i feel like ive said that many times before
i feel extremely guilty about even acknowledging that but at the the same time time i feel a moment of relief in the thought
honestly I don’t know what im going to do, ive lost all progress.
the only thing holding me back is the fear of hurting my parents by going through with it, its also all that i have left
but at the same time the weight just gets heavier by every moment
I don’t know how to deal …

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7

One day it’ll all be over

  March 18th, 2019 by Soda

I was thinking about how self-important we humans feel we are. “No one suffers more than I do. Life has been so unfair only to me. My problems are the biggest, etc.” we say to ourselves.

When I think back on my life, I realize how useless it really has become for me. I remember how great and lofty I felt in my early 20s (aside from the times I was feeling down about myself).

I was going to university, feeling like a big shot because I was doing a difficult degree program which also paid well once you graduated, dated some hot university chicks, I …

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8

Silent Guardian Owl

  March 18th, 2019 by Night In Atlantis


It is already far too late in the day and the dead of night will soon be here, but for once I feel alive and the urge to be somewhere else. You have been a loyal companion in my thoughts for some time, and I set out to look for you.

Warm summer sun on my back, be kind to me. I feel a single bead of sweat trickle down and sting my eye. The hill ridges carry on endlessly, with shortness of breath and drunk with fatigue I stumble but keep walking determinedly. Where are you, night …

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1

Returning to my cat

  March 17th, 2019 by LittleBead

After 5 months of co-renting with my father, I’m going to return home next week on Tuesday. I feel utterly sick with my father’s behaviour (namely screaming at me and calling me names), and I won’t allow this treatment any longer. He’s been using me for lowering his and his partner’s bills, making me pay half of them while each of them pays only 25%. Ridiculous. But this is the last time I get tricked into such a thing. I have arranged services for bringing my furniture to my mother’s flat (she’s fucked up but not as much as my father is). I don’t know …

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0

So ready to just drink the fncking poison!

  March 17th, 2019 by WastedLife

I’m so fncking over it all… Chronic pain and illness is just taking its toll… I just wish I had the courage of the character in Paddelton on Netflix… Such courage! He just says I’m ready and drinks it down… No more of this insane world, body or dysfunctional relationships that just seem to permeate everyone in our civilization thats not so very civilized. God I have faith that you’ll give me the strength to lift the poison to my lips and gulp it down like the spiritual warrior trusted servant of self love that I’ve made myself out to be… But really I’m just a

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0

  March 17th, 2019 by Tellmewhy

Loneliness is killing me, i’m also bored n tired
I wish l have an adventurous life

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0

My last shindig

  March 17th, 2019 by mr.biaggi46

Last night i had a party at my house with a few friends. I tried to get all my coworkers and friends there, and luckily for me most of them showed up. I kept bringing it up and reminding people that it’ll be my last outting. The last time I will really be out or see people. What they didn’t know was i was planning to kill myself after they left.

The party was fun. Lots of drinks and lots of laughter, so when everyone left I originally thought i was just over reacting. Until i tried to actually fall asleep. All i kept thinking bout …

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1

Its time

  March 17th, 2019 by Justanotherbody

I cant call anybody. I cant ask for help. It’s not who I am. I’m here because none of you know me. I’ve finally decided it’s time for me to go. I’m not a good person anyways so this will only hurt people for a little bit if at all.

I’m tired of the pain. Im tired of the life I have to live. My only choice is death or pain. Surgery is too expensive, and there are still more tests before that is even an option. I will die anyways, but at least this way there are no extra big medical bills that will carry …

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2

Scale

  March 17th, 2019 by Once

 

Occasionally I need to restore perspective to my kooky mind.

Carl Sagans speech helps.

It reminds me how darn big everything really is, and how insignificant I am.

A photo of Earth, taken from somewhere around four trillion miles away, I believe, by a Voyager spacecraft, many years ago. Just a pale blue dot, inhabited by weenies.

Pass the mustard.

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3

The beginning

  March 17th, 2019 by awis

Hello everyone, I’m not a native speaker, so at first I would like to apologise for any mistakes I’ll possibly make in this post.

I don’t plan to leave any suicide notes, because I don’t have anything to say to most of the people and those to whom I do, wouldn’t want to listen. I’m writing this journal, because I don’t want people to freely shape my image after I die. Especially that they only see me as an idiot, or a monster, or a silly fool. Or a failure (that part is true though).

I found this website, while searching for the most suitable metods on …

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Thank you

  March 17th, 2019 by dsemfodi

I’ve reached this stage of my life where I just feel so thankful to all the people I’ve met and made me who I am today. You guys were my biggest blessing. And I don’t think I would’ve been who I am today without you. I just want to say thank you and I love you all. I just need you to know this because anything can happen. I love you all so much and with all my heart.

 

rxexAxnxd

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