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0

New Year, Same Me

  January 22nd, 2019 by Blue65

I’ve come full circle. I’d gone from a depressed, lonely fuck, to a less lonely, depressed fuck.
I remember all the times I’d browse this site, scoffing at the people who somehow were still miserable, despite having someone to love- and now here I am.

Though I’m told the feeling’s mutual, I know it isn’t. They finally got sick of my small outbursts, my shitty mood all the time… so I turned it off.

I put the walls back up, and now finally it seems to be done. Now I don’t need to ruin their mood with my pesky feelings, now I don’t have to bore them with …

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Can you accept sometimes suicide is the best answer?

  January 22nd, 2019 by Counting Down

It’s hard to accept and I think most people like to believe suicide is NEVER a good answer or to repeat a cliché “suicide is a short term solution to a long term problem.” But if we’re really honest we gotta admit there are some times, some very rare situations where suicide truely is the best solution.

Case in point… this guy… went out like a boss. https://thoughtcatalog.com/chelsea-fagan/2013/08/a-60-year-old-man-killed-himself-today-and-left-this-incredibly-detailed-website-as-his-suicide-note/

I only just recently found that article from 2013, and 6 years is ancient history on the internet. Sadly both the original site and the archived sites are now gone. Still, in reading that article I found myself thinking I …

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4

Waiting Over The Edge

  January 22nd, 2019 by NO_REMORSE

My new medication has arrived finally. Max dose, and 3 month supply. This will surely be more than enough to put an end to my misery.

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0

ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

  January 22nd, 2019 by ELECTRICAT

this is so frustrating!!!!

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0

Just lovely

  January 22nd, 2019 by visual eyes

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0

Update on Me

  January 22nd, 2019 by Todamnbad

Still here, I told you guys around January 1, I was going to end it. But didn’t. Its truly an accomplishment if you’re able to pull it off. I have failed multiple times. I have been more religious since then. As corny as it sounds, I been trying to find God and become more faithful. I used to worship the devil. But that was because all the hate I had for God. Couldn’t imagine why he would put me through so much hardship. Well I listen to a really great story, it changes my views on it, his name is John Ramirez, he has a …

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4

what?!

  January 22nd, 2019 by heartlessviking

What does anyone expect. I put out my misery into the world, people don’t like that. I understand, I don’t like it when other people put their misery into my view. There’s plenty of unhappiness inside me. So I try to put out positivity, humor, and being helpful. That ticks people off even more.

So what does anyone want, because I’ve given my best, I’ve given my worst. It’s enough to make me want to give nothing, because it feels like no one wants me.

Then I share my feelings, and still not the desired response. What do I want? Fricken empathy man, the hot drug of …

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  January 21st, 2019 by noah5678

I feel like god is mocking me and I hate my life

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4

Long rant,

  January 21st, 2019 by c-ta

It’s been exactly a year now since I last posted to this website, which is sort of weird. I like the format of it, so I desperately looked for it and finally found it!

For some BG information (if it’s helpful I guess lol ig it helps me!), I’m 16 (17 in April) and FTM but not at all out to most people close to me in my life, especially including close family. I have a history of self-harming since I was about 12 years old, and my parents became aware of it 1-2 years ago. I have stopped as of now but have relapsed a …

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10

Focus

  January 21st, 2019 by hiohneh

I decided to return to school to obtain an associate degree (it’s all I can afford.) If I’m able to enter the work force then I’ll at least have a bit more education to list.

However, my depression and anxiety along with my fatigue seem to have worsened. I just don’t have the strength to focus, and everyday I wish I would die.

Honestly, I could put in the minimum amount of work required to pass and be done with it. Like they say: “C’s get degrees.”

I still plan to end my life, so trying to succeed in life is a waste.

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7

Fwck it

  January 21st, 2019 by Tellmewhy

I hate that l oscillate between wanting to live, to die, to change the impossible
I hate that l have and had shitty mental, physical and emotional states for all my life
I hate that l took these antipsychotics for the last ten years and l still have not got used to their effects
I do not like that l spend too much time inside the house not doing much
I hate it that people do not help, do not understand me
I hate some things, my life, my lifestyle. I hope some will understand me and l will try to change it soon
It hurts man, it fuckin hurts for …

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0

stuck

  January 21st, 2019 by miszion

wandering, she slowly becomes more numb
twenty five years eating away at her heels
she should go so much further,
but she lands herself stuck in the mud somewhere
time frozen all around her, it seems
the world is still turning
only
without her

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13

Living With It

  January 21st, 2019 by thehusk

Fear is my constant companion. Not sheer terror, but a background hum of dread and unease. I would distinguish it from anxiety, which manifests in many worries about trivial details of everyday life. This runs deeper, and colors  everything I do.

I fear judgement. Being confronted with the things I’ve done, and having to answer for them. For others to see the wretchedness within me.

There are fundamental parts of me that I can recognize are wrong, rationally speaking. That could cause great harm in certain circumstances. And yet they don’t feel wrong, in themselves. Quite the opposite. That’s part of the problem. The guilt and the …

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5

Lazy fuck

  January 21st, 2019 by PatheticMale

I am just lazy and there is nothing more to it. I am not like you guys… I bet most of you try your hardest in life and feel like shit regardless… But I am not like that. I literally put 0 efford into this life … How could I even expect having some self esteem? I am so naive. Self esteem is a reward for doing something hard and meaningful. But I dont do anything besides smoking weed and playing video games in my moms house like every stereotypical loser. Its no wonder I feel like shit… Its no wonder I

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8

Nothing gets better

  January 21st, 2019 by princessmousy<:3)~

Can it all please stop already? Please. I have no future. There’s nothing good. Nothing. I want to be done but I can’t. I have to live for my mum. That’s not fair. I didn’t ask to be born. I don’t really feel like eating anymore I can barely eat my food. I want to do nothing. Be nothing. Because I am NOTHING.

The world is too harsh and cruel, and I don’t see a future for us.

I wish that everything would end. I want it to end. Please end.

End my suffering!

(Sorry for the pic….)
Just wanted …

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13

Hibernation

  January 21st, 2019 by Atintofgreen

I though I could accept the ending before the beginning.

I knew that our hello always meant good-bye.

See you soon at winters end.

 

 

 

 

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2

  January 20th, 2019 by Piratemermaid

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15

Note to self

  January 20th, 2019 by velveteennightingale

If you look in the mirror and don’t see a single thing worthy of being loved, why would anyone else love you?

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1

Life feels off

  January 20th, 2019 by NO_REMORSE

My life isnt right anymore. Im not normal. I forgot my head somewhere. Lost track of time, days, people. Showing a perfect image to everyone around me, but its only a mask. A mask i am trapped in, screaming for help in my mind. But i cant let it out, i refuse. Everything makes me cry, i never cry. I met the devil, my arm is covered in slashes. Im passing through all the phases, yes like i always have. But this is different, life officially feels off. Its a haze, i dont recognize it, everything is sinister, i am paranoid of everything. I feel …

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4

Obligatory Post on My End

  January 20th, 2019 by Cause of Death: Suicide

I’ve been thinking a lot lately and I’ve been feeling a bit like every moment of my life has been a waste of time. I’ve tried to change things because I’m advanced in the old “fake it to make it” so I’ve stopped that and have grown much more cynical. I still see it everywhere around me. In other news, I feel like I am failing myself. I don’t know to feel bad about it quite yet because I don’t want to get too wrapped around anything in particular and I guess that’s why I have chosen (unconsciously) to fail myself. I feel I have failed …

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