Family & Friends Effects

The effects of suicide on family and friends.

1

Trump turned everyone against me…

  October 11th, 2018 by JustSomeGuy4455

Two of my most recent posts got deleted I believe because I was linking  to other websites. I know that this place is a safe space where I can vent out my frustrations without judgement, so I’m going to try again.

 

As I said, I don’t think I love my mother anymore. I wish I could make her see what she needs to reap when I heard that Trump is “transporting thousands of immigrant children into camp cities.” I outright said that I wanted to punch her. She chose Trump over her own autistic asexual child.

 

Trump turned my own people against each other as well as …

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3

Living a life you never wanted

  October 8th, 2018 by Thedarkwritter

So here i am, idk where to start, but let me..

I am the first daughter of the family, i live in asia, and my mom really gives all the burdens to me. She really wants me to live her dream. I unconsciously live that way bcs i’ve been told the value of being obedient.

I have to meet their expectations, if i am not, maybe it was not a direct judge towards me but they’ll keep telling me abt how much i became a burden for them.

I can’t live it anymore, i have my own dream, my own life.

Now i am suffering from depression, idk what …

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3

All I Want

  October 7th, 2018 by SuzieSalmon

My mindset hasn’t changed since January, I still envision myself not existing anymore but I’ve gained more sorrow because I’m around my family more. It gives me guilt, makes me feel so selfish. For once I just wish I could envision being where I feel is home and building the life I’ve missed out on. I wish there was nothing wrong with me and I wish I was strong enough for my family and for my husband. I want to be better. Its almost, December.

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6

no way out

  October 6th, 2018 by AKidWithAName

She was drunk.  Doesn’t that make it my fault?  She was raped before.  That’s the only reason she did it.  She wouldn’t have done it to me if it wasn’t done to her.  She was too drunk to know what she was doing and it wasn’t her fault, right?  And God will condemn me for adultery and homosexuality.  She’s taken any chance of heaven away from me.  She stripped me of any hope for a future.  There is nothing after this.  Not even death could let me escape this hell.  It’s never going to end and I am going to continue to be tortured by …

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0

Today I cry.

  October 6th, 2018 by strawberrycrown

I always try

To never cry.

Nobody must see

The tears coming out of me.

On the inside

My emotions hide.

So nobody can see,

That today I cry.

 

Very few people in my life have seen me cry and I like to keep it that way. My friends think of me as always being happy and this has been true for a little while. However, someone new come into my life a couple weeks ago and really messed with my head the last few days. He made me feel worthless and question everything good in my life. It made me have other struggles with close friends which caused me to be so …

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4

I have no one

  October 4th, 2018 by Itscolourlife

They said your family, friends, or someone in this world
There must be someone who can help you
No..
Ive tried it..

I try to tell them but they are not there
I try to tell my friends but they got annoyed and leave me at the end
I try to tell my mom but she just said get over it
I try to tell my sister but she just said im stress too
I try to tell my dad but he said you are worthy try your best

Im trying but i never been there
What I want to be
What I want to have
Kill me
Please kill me
Please

They said the one you left will have …

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3

This is why I have trust issues

  October 2nd, 2018 by GerbzBaby

When I finally think I found the person(s) in my life to help me through hardships and show me that I can trust others again, I’m let down. Again. And again. And again. It’s to the point we’re I’m completely numb to it. I tell myself “You know it’s coming, it’s only a matter of time.” Then, eventually it happens. I tried to tell him that what he thought wasn’t true. That I just want him to understand. That I did appreciate him, but I need time for myself. He keeps thinking I’m making excuses not to talk to him. “You just don’t want to …

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1

Against the grain

  September 28th, 2018 by lonewolf23

It’s tough when your going through changes. It seems everyone wants to hold you back. As somebody with social anxiety it can get exhausting when others hate on you for breaking your shell. Many of these people are not even the social ones but rather the other quiet ones. They give me dirty looks that seem to be saying “You’re a loner, don’t even try!”. They may have given up hope but I still haven’t. I know i can overcome i Social anxiety. These days i just embrace all the weird feelings that come along with getting out of my comfort zone. And although I’ve …

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8

I can’t stop crying

  September 22nd, 2018 by sugarcoated

Last night, I had my 18th birthday. I invited 13 people. And only 4 showed up. We made so much food. The evidence of people not coming is still here. People just told me they couldn’t come last minute. I felt shitter as the night went on.

I had a 3 tier cake. A fire pit to roast marshmallows. Cocktails. Multiple games. In the end it didn’t matter what was at the party people still didn’t show.

It was half an hour until two of my friends showed. They were the first guests. I thought they were the only ones coming until another two showed up. I felt …

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2

The despair is starting to lift a bit.

  September 22nd, 2018 by NiceGuy2001

When New Years Eve arrives, IF it arrives for me, I think I will be very happy to say goodbye to 2018, because this year has been the most difficult and painful year of my entire life.

The despair hit me again a couple of days ago. Every time the despair hits, it wears me down a little bit more, and sometimes I think there will be nothing left. And this time the despair was pretty bad. On the one-to-ten scale of despair, this was about an eight. But it’s starting to lift a bit. I hope I can hold on. If I don’t, I think …

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0

I need to move somewhere after the next 3 Months

  September 17th, 2018 by Yikrens

or maybe in march. I don’t feel save around here. People mix up my Medicine, Parents are stealing my Medicine and I am very in my Pension at age 23. As if People are living to now or then to hear what I do. It was once even worse but that means nothing.

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1

Choking

  September 17th, 2018 by Lillian_Jean

I have recently moved to a new home in a new city with my parents, and my boyfriend of three years. I have only just lived with my parents prior to this and have had similar feelings in the past few years. In the last city I was in, I had a decent job and so did my boyfriend. I had planned all would go smoothly and I would be able to move out of their home and my boyfriend and I could buy a home shortly. But my dad got another job forcing my parents to need to move, I originally thought i could …

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6

Life is boring , Reality is boring , real life is boring , real world is boring

  September 14th, 2018 by niki

Especially when you’ve realized that nothing we do here in reality will ever compare to our imaginations. And no, I’m not talking about petty, shallow, superficial, & stupid imaginations like most people only have with their simple-minded brains. I’m talking about all those best fantasy movies, games, novels, comic books, anime/manga, etc, with all their magic, superpowers, & magical, fantasy, adventurous world/universe with its limitless, unlimited possibilities.

Fuck this reality.
Reality is boring, stupid, & depressing.

reality is boring , life is boring ,
it’s all about money
i hate money
i hate business
i wish i live in the movie game anime manga novel comics books

I hate …

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0

This thrill inside of Me

  September 13th, 2018 by Yikrens

How to you name the Power in us to make the Final Move, to give into something, to cry and to be forced to seek for food and water? The urge to smoke or to go for drugs.

Such an Movement inside of me is thrilling me to get to my own Rental. Anybody there in the Town is more of an fellow peasant than a friend and those who are a friend to me can’t actual set a rule for itself or have a proper set-up.

I like to be there. I can sleep there at least. I have nothing there yet about connectivity. …

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1

I’m breathing

  September 12th, 2018 by ariusversea

You don’t need to tell me all the reason I should hate myself. I already know them. I repeat them to myself every night with nootropics to keep me awake and kicking. Kicking myself for being a failure, for not doing anything right. For never being enough.

I try to do everything right. I read the textbooks, look over my notes, do the work. I could not work for an entire MONTH, an entire 30 DAYS, and I would STILL be advanced in my classes. because I work hard. I “grind” and “hustle” everyday. But unless I haven’t walked in the snow in nothing but flip …

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1

Left Out

  September 12th, 2018 by rubbish

being left out always sucks. but i don’t complain about being left out. it’s just that… i feel like i’m unable to reach them or can’t compare to them. i watch their backs and i feel like i don’t belong to their group. we have been together for almost a decade. but the feeling of being left out is more persistent recently. it felt like this two years ago, but recently, once again, but the feeling is stronger. i don’t want to say that they don’t care about me, but i’m really having second thoughts on going with them or even getting near them. i …

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0

Yes Im a Baby

  September 11th, 2018 by Itscolourlife

I just want you to be there

Ask me
Whats wrong
What happened
Are you okay

Tell me
Your story
Your pain
Your love

Is it too hard as a family ?
Im at my limit

My smile
My laugh
Its fake

See through me
Love me

PS :
One day if you read this when Im gone…
At least you know what I feel
How I longed for your love and touch like a baby

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1

Love

  September 9th, 2018 by Yikrens

I had found here the struggle of someone wearing about its relationship and the inability to share the real thoughts. Will it hold? Can this endure? I blame my Mind if we not set-up together forever. To be passed by for another. To get replaced.

It is so sweet how clueless I was about this feelings. I never knew them. Even when it had been cheated on me my heart and my mind chanted for the most precious thing I lived ever then. I still feel it, I can’t lie about. When we shared a bed for the night, me laying on my device phoning for …

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1

When I tried to tell you so many things, you claimed— you knew everything. Today when there is nothing left to say, in your silence I realise, you knew nothing. Not a single thing

2

Mistakes leading into and sustaining my marriage

  September 6th, 2018 by shadow-elk

Over ten years ago, I left a long-term relationship for what I hoped was going to be a happy, fulfilling marriage.

I’d been raised to be a good girl. A doormat, really. I was to put others’ needs before my own. If I was nice, others would like me and do things for me. I was also taught that men would do stupid things and I just had to accept the things they did; “boys will be boys.” This poor upbringing led me to believe that it was normal for men to be childish, sex-hungry idiots and I just had to put up with it.

My first …