Family & Friends Effects

The effects of suicide on family and friends.

2

my life is a mess

September 19th, 2017by iamdarling

i’m ugly.

i’m untalented.

i have no friends.

i haven’t attended school for two years.

my family are abusive.

 

 

my life is a mess, and i can’t clean it up.

i have nothing going for me,

and i am going nowhere.

i’ve ruined myself and my life.

 

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2

Disappointment?Always been one.

September 18th, 2017by YetAnother

Have you felt like you can just never do anything right? All you want is to make something right but every time you try, it only gets messier?
I have been like that for a while now. Iam far from being a ” normal person”. Everyone wants to mould me into someone they need. And yet I try, only so that I could feel accepted for once. Feel loved for once. And guess what happens?
Everything I think I have something or someone, I only end up losing them.
Everyone seem to need me once in a while and every time, I ask for an ounce of care,

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4

don’t belong

September 18th, 2017by lo_15

hi

I am 15 years old, and every day I fell like I don’t belong and I feel that when people call me fat or ugly that I need to just leave this world so they will not have to look at me, the age at when I felt this way was when I was 9 years old and my birth mom got back on drugs and I have not talked to her sinc, so u see it was when she chose drugs over me over my siblings but they are so happy with there lives then there is me all alone you see they don’t …

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1

The time when everything stopped permanently

September 17th, 2017by LastMonths

Once there was a glee good boy who had everything he ever wanted a complete family with normal days and a normal life. Until one day his father decided to fuck everything up leaving them without any fucking clue as to where,what,why he did it.

The boy tried to find his father with her mother helping her to move on in the process, but the boy was stuck in time he was in a permanent loop of asking why.

Then came the days we call everyday life for him it was hard and he was trying his best, then one day his drunkard uncle beat him down …

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10

my new kitten

September 16th, 2017by iamdarling

today, i brought home my new kitten.

he is so small, and so sweet – and currently unnamed. i’ll update this post and tell you his name when i have chosen it.

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16

Hope – The Pain Does Go Away

September 15th, 2017by jcau

Hi all,

This is one of my first posts here.

A few years ago, I was in a pretty dark place. I was convinced that my life was a burden and that I’d never be able to shake the bad thoughts that came persistently. Every day was a struggle. Nothing was improving and I was getting suicidal thoughts.

Some of you may be in the same or a similar situation. Please know that things get better. I’m still here. I’m still fighting. It is a fight. It might be the hardest thing you do, but you’re worth it. You’re worth the fight and life is worth fighting for.

You have no …

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4

Lost, Hurting, and Downward Spiral

September 15th, 2017by grayjune

TL;DR- I used to be a good kid, then I ruined myself and tried to abandon school. I’ve had such a bumpy ride but it never stopped going downhill. I am so lost and the pressure is getting to me deeply. I want to end it all but I still feel guilt eating at me for leaving my family to suffer.

I want to start off by saying that I used to be happy, energetic and was, at some point, an intelligent kid. I was responsible and did school work and homework on time. Fast forward to 8th grade where the real problems began. I developed …

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6

Fake Friends

September 11th, 2017by Lostsoul_20

I hate that my “friends” are all friends with my rapist – they claim not to be but they very obviously are. Always talking to him, laughing with him, partying with him, visiting his place, cooking for him at one point fucking him. I wish they could see how deteriorating this is. Its not enough to say I should be the one to say don’t hang out with him. if some guy that you say you’re only acquaintances with rapes you’re friend you get rid of the guy. Don’t make excuses as to why you continue to get close to him and apologise and continue …

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9

I won’t be able to handle life anymore

September 7th, 2017by sugarcoated

I am 16 and in a week I’ll be 17.

Today my dad spoke with my teachers and talked about how I’m doing in school (grade 11).

The usual stuff they say:

• I’m quiet

• I sit alone (in some classes)

• I don’t participate in classes

those kind of things.

My teachers also said how bad I’m doing. And my parents didn’t react that well.

My dad is pissed at me.

And my mum hates me. She always says that “I’m useless” and that “no one will hire me for a job” and that “I’ll be picking up garbage and living on the streets.” And she’s always adds that “I’ll be dead …

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3

Any survivors blame their partner?

September 6th, 2017by lonely87

Im really struggling to understand how/why my husband chose not only to blame me but to make a campaign out of it in his suicide. His note blames a threat I made (I kept threatening to have him arrested for his violence, I was referring to historical violence but he was paranoid and thought I’d lie and say it was ongoing) but also makes reference to needing the kids to be saved from me, calling me a monster. He left a list of alleged domestic abuse I’d done which ranges from true, to lie, to downright bizarre, to deliberately calculated to sound like something bad …

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1

what it feels like

September 6th, 2017by claryland

i almost hate everything. and i’m most dissatisfied with all things.

but i had some frozen yogurt today with my two friends and it was the first day of school. i dislike being so young and feeling this way—everyone says you shouldn’t have to feel this way at such a young age?

but i realized after i sat down with the two of them and was looking forward to enjoy a small bowl of frozen yogurt, i had immediately thought that i’d rather be in my bed listening to some vast silence that i’ve come to love.

everyone was so nice and so kind and so was i. …

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33

I drove my husband to suicide.

September 4th, 2017by lonely87

For those of you thinking about it, or those of you who have ‘survived’ it either as an attempter or someone close to them, here’s my story.

I’m 30, and my husband D was 31. We were together for 11 years and married for 9 of those, with two young daughters aged 7 and 2.

I won’t lie, the first 2-3 years we put each other through hell – I would obsess and interrogate him over silly things, go on and on at him, we argued a lot, he would lash out/snap and be violent. He was immature – I remember during one argument in the car …

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4

No support from family

August 31st, 2017by Lorandian

So, I posted on here awhile back about how I was finding a neutral state to live in…not happy, but not depressed. Well since then I have started therapy and things have gotten worse. Actually it’s not that they got worse, just that I began to realize how shit I was being treated by my family. That my parents are actually alcoholics, both them and my brother use me for money, that my sister is a carbon copy of my mother, and that they only want me around so they have someone to control. These weren’t my extrapolations, they were my therapists…at first I just …

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2

On August 8th 2017,

August 29th, 2017by darkwillow

you died. It’s irrelevant to me whether we only talked a few times a long time ago, or that you stopped replying to my messages months ago. Even when someone I hardly know takes their life, it feels like it takes part of mine with it. Another beautiful person in this world, gone forever.

 

Ive been eating less, all of my social aspects (which I had little to begin with) have vanished, I haven’t been messaging anyone for a long time now, It’s like I stopped time when she left. And I don’t know why. I don’t know how to fix this. I don’t know how …

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1

Pathetic Person w/ Pathetic Reasoning

August 28th, 2017by AllBarkNoBite

At the very least, I hope this scatter-brained post will give you a laugh. Just kidding, I don’t hope for anything, save for what I mention in the following. Well, maybe some sections of this post will resonate with anyone who might read it some day.

Once I become financially stable and relatively successful, I might want to kill myself in complete sobriety so that I can prove this point to my dad: Not all suicides are a result of drug-ingestion or addiction. I’ve always wanted to die since I was a child. I even told my mom that “I want to go to Heaven already,” …

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7

Can you relate?

August 26th, 2017by SvanaOfRiften

I’m not sure if I would rather cease to live or run away. I was fantasizing how I’d like to leave and make it look like I just disappeared. Set my coffee like it was set to brew, leave my purse where it hangs, and only take shoes from the back of my closet and go. I don’t know what would be worse for my family to think. I killed myself or disappeared. I’m the epitome of selfish, but I hate my life. I resent my husband, whom I divorced and remarried. I hate that I’m lonely and being a stay at home mom puts …

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2

how to deal with an abusive family?

August 26th, 2017by iamdarling

almost my entire family are abusive, but i won’t get into all of that; i’ll start with who/what affects me most – the family i live with…

my younger sister is verbally, emotionally and physically abusive,

and my nan is verbally and emotionally abusive.

they are both controlling and manipulating too, and their moods can go from being nice, kind and cheerful to horrible in seconds.

they blame me for lots of things that aren’t my fault, if they are not being abusive towards me, they clash with eachother and come back to me and talk shit about the other behind their back…

these are things i deal with multiple …

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16

My Note…. Suggestions?

August 24th, 2017by philly1962

Here is my note, purposefully vague or else it would be a novel.

This is not a suicide note. This is simply my documentation that I purposefully and willfully decided to put a permanent end to my physical and emotional pain.

I weighed all my options carefully, choosing the one that would ultimately be beneficial to all involved. I must admit I went so far as to insure that everyone was angry at me to make it that much easier.

My girls are grown independent women that no longer need the likes of a clingy father in their lives. Therefore, without me around,they will be able to enjoy …

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1

They are back.

August 23rd, 2017by Eccedentesiastsoul

Lately I’ve ben having these migraines that take everything that’s in me to stand. It’s not new, I used to have them daily until they somehow, the same pain transferred to my stomach. I got it checked out by a doctor long back and he gave me pills and said I was fine to go. Now the pain is back and it’s stronger than ever. I’m not being over dramatic or anything but it hurts to the point where I actually think there’s something wrong with me. Before I got back to my country I got a strong one and I literally cried myself to …

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3

The reason for me to live, is so others may not die

August 23rd, 2017by KoertsMeijer1997

I honestly am not sure where to start this all off. This is a very long story, just to let you know. For starters, I am a 20yo male. I’ve dealt with severe clinical depression, anxiety, and anger issues since I was 11yo.

I am a current EMT and am a Paramedic student in Maryland. I joined the fire department when I was 17, and have been an EMT since I was 18.

One of my first calls as a 17yo EMT student, it had been a pretty tough day. We had already run a cardiac arrest, and I was in general having one of my down …

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