Family & Friends Effects

The effects of suicide on family and friends.

6

Suicide or not?

January 17th, 2017by Randomaccess10

The doctors fucked me up on meds. Forced me to take antidepressants after id already had serotinin syndrome…then i smoked a load with the stress, and had oxygen after to try and fix things…causing more damage, a day in the life of me is like imagine wearing earmuffs, with a car alarm sound 24/7, while your vision is like a home video recording shaking, with the brightness on zero and color turned down, with a bad aerial connection, and you have lead weights strapped to your arms and legs and a jug of water on your head….my little fingers hurt and dont move properly, and …

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15

My Dad Died a Year Ago

My Dad Died a Year Ago

January 17th, 2017by SeeSmith

I miss him, but it’s OK.

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1

Frustrating. When Life Keeps Betraying You Even After Death. “A Ballad of Life: Aram Niakan’s Suicide Story.”

It’s a slap on the face. It’s fu*king insulting how some unfortunate ones are screwed over in death, just as they were in life. There are so many places/countries where they don’t give a rat’s ass for somebody’s last will that it’s enraging..!

8

My Story

January 14th, 2017by 90Grayson

Hello everyone, my name is Daniel, and I think I’m going to commit suicide very shortly, I want to anyways, not sure if I will though, since things in life change so much, but I hope that moment arrives in a week or two. I don’t know where to start, I’m done trying to figure out why I’m like this, why I have suicidal thoughts, why I cut myself, why I feel so much pain all the time. It sucks, it really sucks to be this way, I don’t believe in destiny, but I cannot avoid feeling like I am trapped, and have absolutely no …

5

January 10th, 2017

January 10th, 2017by kellinandrew

I told him i wanted to kill myself. That i even planned it out for that night. I think im falling back into my old eating disorder habits, especially since i checked my weight. I feel like a waste of space and i know he loves me, but it feels like he is the only one. Is there anyone else who cares, I know suicide is a selfish thing, the most selfish thing, a person can do to another. But sometimes it seems like the only option. What to do.. what to do…

6

Disappearing

January 7th, 2017by BrokenX2

Sometimes I question, why am I still here? I feel like crawling under a rock and stay there. One time I feel okay, next time I feel completely sad. I’ve deactivated all of my social media, not like anybody actually cares. My friends and family won’t even notice my absence, Maybe after 6 months I guess. Nobody really cares about me.

3

Alpha Cluster F€ck?

January 7th, 2017by slitmelife

Ok: let me start by stating 

I suffer from Bipolar Depression diagnosed over 13years ago and last therapy session that I actually went to and could afford 2006! The self – medicating sh*t lasts only but so long!

I have a turmoil “we should be a murder- suicide”any minute relationship but decent no cops called.

Its like high school bullying with a side of manipulation with sexual contact on the rarity.  Real f€cking great example just like our parents weren’t.  Lol ?

I would like to just End him,but that’s just sh*t I am writing. Only person I be ever managed to hurt is myself and deeply it seems.

We …

0

Why am I can’t be just happy?

January 5th, 2017by sadliet

Firstly, I should sorry for my English, I’m not a native speaker. So, okay…

Why am I can’t be just happy? Why I have to bear all this pain, hiding deep inside in me? I only want to smile so heartily as I was smiling before but it seems to me that I need to wait a lot of time before I can say that I am really happy. I just hate to wear this mask, to behave like everything is okay, to lie to myself that this time will end soon.

I’m tired. I’m so tired of it…

It’s started in the beginning of August, and I …

10

Hope in Better Days

January 3rd, 2017by amarie75

I came across this site actually looking for ways to easily kill myself without having, yet another, hospital visit. Which isn’t something I would normally do, but I had and have been desperate. I have quite a few issues of my own, just as many do on this site, but I have always been one to succeed and overcome because I put it to myself to do just that.

Here’s a little back story; my mother was pregnant with me over suppos-ed rape. She had me and chose to give me up because she supposedly had a sickness that made her very ill at the time. …

2

Why is it always a tragedy?

January 3rd, 2017by an_old_child

You have no idea how many times I typed all that down and deleted it. (I am referring to the story of my thoughts by “that”)

it all seems great and wonderful when it is inside my brain, but when i say it aloud (or in this case; type it down) it seems sarcastically unimportant.

i haven’t lived for about two years. everything has changed, suddenly and adversely. i don’t feel good at all.

yes! i don’t feel good at all! that’s the best way to explain it.

8

I’m a coward

December 31st, 2016by beautifulsinner

im a coward. one big coward with daddy issues. to him, it seems like my problems are far from real, and that they’re just in my head. that if i just “thought” about being happy, i would be. newsflash, depression doesn’t work like that. i cant just turn my suicidal thoughts off. believe me, i would if i could. but i cant, and thats why im sitting here in the psych ward hating myself and wondering why im still alive. id be happy if it was that easy.

but instead, the doctors are trying to get me to talk to my father about my feelings. but …

5

Grieving

December 30th, 2016by LostSoul

My Nan practically raised me when I was younger and today marks the four year anniversary of her death; she died when I was 13 or cancer. Most of the time I get by quite fine, when I don’t think about it, I try and push it away, but right now, it’s so hard.
I can’t stop crying and I know grieving is normal, but I just, is it still okay to cry? When will it stop being okay? Does it stop being okay when people around you forget who she was? Why does my mind still sometimes forget she’s dead, and why do I still …

0

Once again, a broken heart.

December 29th, 2016by Elliot97

It seems every attempt at love is just another masked use of my time and remaining emotion. First time my heart was broken I failed my ALevels, UUUU in all my subjects and now 3 years down the line, living with whom I thought was the one does the same. I don’t want to live like this anymore, even in a relationship you become lonely. I actually hate myself for thinking people have the ability to change or be different, sort of explains why I can’t change to being happy. Only took for 2 years to admit dishonestly and unloyalty, 2 years. I’ve reached the …

2

Shame.

December 25th, 2016by Scaredsincebirth1

I admire and envy people in this site who can put their pain in words. Who can compose sentences so they became storys. In my opinion that’s a big thing because I’m unable to do that. At least you have some kind of relationship with yourself. At this point, I can’t describe my emptiness because I’m certain that my personality and soul stopped evolving at a very young age. It stopped evolving because my mother was distant and never looked into my eyes and I didn’t learn anything about empathy and love at the very young age. I’ve studied psychology a little bit and I …

6

December 24th, 2016by SomewhereBlue

Does anyone think that committing suicide is a selfish act? and why?

1

musings of a madman

December 24th, 2016by Darkspark

When I die and my brain shuts off my consciousnesses will cease to be and I will exist only in the minds of others. And if no one truly knew me then I may has well never existed at all. I have accomplished nothing and leave no legacy. A life time of deep contemplation and I leave behind nothing but fragments of thoughts posted anonymously in a  dark corner of the internet to be lost among thousands of others written by people just like me.

But I wonder how the people I care about will remember me? Will they remember all the good times, or will …

3

To the One I Love

December 22nd, 2016by BrokenKitten

I’m sorry for everything I’ve put you through. I know that even though you say you love me, you must also hate me by now as well. I’ve felt that you do for quite a while now, you can say it, I won’t blame you for it. You’ve been opening up after all these years, telling me the things I already knew…
I always told myself it’s just my lack of self esteem, it’s my depression, my own hatred for myself projected onto you. You always told me not to think of myself so poorly, don’t worry, I love you. Finally you’ve been honest, and …

6

A Truthful Look at Suicidal Impulses (Reality, Documentary)

  It is difficult for people to understand the mind and behavior of those affected by true Bipolar Depression Disorder. Identifying, accepting and treating it in a child, that must be extremely challenging. If life isn’t worth living, it definitely isn’t worth dying for either. With all due respect, if you believe there is no […]

9

Reaching out to the void

December 18th, 2016by Broken-Toy

It’s funny, families and friends of suicide victims always say “I wish I’d known,” or “I wish they’d said something.” But when you reach out there is no one there to take your hand. They are so consumed in their own lives to take notice of overt requests for help. I reached out, without saying specifically why I needed them here but made it obvious something was very wrong, and got back only “I can’t, I’m too busy.” Fortunately for them, I apparently have a high tolerance to Valium, muscle relaxers, narcotics, and a mix of other stuff because I still woke up this morning.
So …

2

I Hate The Holidays

December 16th, 2016by frostbittendreams

It’s obvious that I hate Christmas because of the ‘happiness’ and ‘cheer’ (and bible thumpers), it makes me gag. I cringe at carols, roll my eyes at mall santas’. -But not only that, I hate family gatherings more than anything.

I’ve acted out at holiday parties for as long as I can remember, all of the pressure to converse and the lying about how school is going makes me over stimulated and dejected. I try so hard to get out of going, but, I’m always forced into it. Usually after about an hour and a half, I find myself locked in my aunt’s bathroom crying with the fan