I Will Survive

I did this, you can too.

0

wednesday – 1:01AM

July 25th, 2017by suicidalkitty

What frustrates me so much is that this sickness taps on my windows on cold, stormy days, begging me not to sleep. It sits on my lap taunting me to caress its soft but stinging, midnight fur. In busy crowds, it whispers my name as i walk, telling me sugar-coated stories of how it made at least 5 souls drain out all the sadness inside of them in thick red in the last 4 hours it left me so i could finally close my eyes and sleep. But on days where i sleep longer and wake up waiting for its thick cloud to suffocate me, i …

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3

Why do I exist?

July 25th, 2017by oganesson315

I was born on February 12, 2002. Whatever the hell my mother had in mind I don’t know… I am a boy. I was born in Ukraine.

My real father wasn’t ready for me and left me when I was 2 yo. That is when my story pretty much begins.

From ages of 5 to 10, I was pretty much raised by my grandparents. They would comfort me every time I cry, which was bad. Every time I was whining or having tantrums, I would get what I want. Which later stuck in me. And I was bullied in school because

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6

My Parents are Narcissists

July 22nd, 2017by BlueDiamond

I’m afraid of writing this post because they might be watching this web-site. I talk and they pretend not to listen, but they’re watching me closely.

I discovered this weeks upon accidently stumbling upon Narcissist parents. They resemble this parenting style the most. When I learned about narcissism. It all everything clicked. Why I’m  so unhappy. Why my self-esteem is so low to almost non-existing. Why my parents confused me, and yet I never wanted to blame them for fear that I’ll upset them like feel their wrath if you challenge let alone question it their ego.

Here, I thought that my mom was overprotected and my …

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3

One More Step.

July 21st, 2017by kellinandrew

I tell myself, one more step, every day. When I wake up, I think, just one more day. I try to keep my mind on one day, one moment, at a time. Because when I begin to let my mind drift, I start to slowly drift away. Sliding into an uncontrollable downward spiral. I cannot keep living my life through the small window I have allowed myself. I feel as if I am completely alone. My boyfriend, is gone. Our relationship fell apart after I lost our baby due to a miscarriage. My rape case against my father has been dismissed. So, he is on …

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1

I’m here for you

July 18th, 2017by firefly11291998

Hey guys, if you see this and want/need to talk. I’m always open to talk. I really want to make someone(anyone) feel like they are worth it….

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3

There are times I’m not miserable

July 17th, 2017by arachnophilia

Monday and Tuesday of last week, I wasn’t miserable. I felt, for the first time in a long time, (months at least) a kind of soothing calm, a low-grade contentment. I was reading a book at the time, and I tucked the emotion around me like a warm robe, luxuriating in it until it inevitably seeped out of me.

The last time I’d felt something like this was during a foggy morning around the middle of the winter semester, while I waited for the bus. My heart was a still cool pond, deep and clear and utterly undisturbed. It lasted for half an hour.

Most of the time …

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20

Techno-Gadgetry

July 16th, 2017by Cordless

Those of you who were here last year might remember  that one of my bucket list items was to learn how to use a smartphone.

I’d gotten the tiniest cheapest one. And I learned how to do SP posts on it.

Aaaand the easier it got, the more I liked it. A lot.

Enough to decide I wanted a better phone.

Bought a new one last week.

Samsung Galaxy Sky J3.

16GB, plus I added a 32GB SD card.

I love it!

The old one feels like a cheap little toy in comparison.

It’s nice to feel happy about something.  🙂

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8

Internal conflict

June 26th, 2017by verbalhues

I see the cookie

My mouth wants to eat the cookie

But my mind argues against it

My stomach will only tolerate a limited amount

But I know my mouth won’t listen

I stared at the cookie

My hands are on standby

The mouth orders the hand to initiate contact

The mind screams for dear life

The stomach begs the mouth for mercy

All was blank for a second…

I stand confused like a dumb fawn in the headlights, mouth stuffed with cookies with the hand’s loyal and eager assistance as my mind panics in terror while my stomach prepares for the unpaid overtime and then… silence.

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12

Knowledge is strength

June 26th, 2017by verbalhues

“Experiences are not just what happen to us, they are the raw material we use in shaping our identity, our self. The person we become can think about the events that shaped us, reevaluate them, and choose how to respond to them. We are not prisoners of our past; we can retain control over how we decide to use aspects of our past in shaping who we want to be and to become.”

– Krystine Batcho

Understanding your perspectives changes your perspectives.

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6

why God tortured me like that?

June 24th, 2017by an_old_child

after years of suffering, it’s getting good at last.

i think i’m feeling happy and it seems to last for a while. the question here is, why did God tortured me like that?

i know that the day would come that everything will turn upside down again and i will feel down and suicidal -since no happiness is everlasting and no sadness, too- and i think that i’m not ready for that day.

i definitely feel stronger than before all these things happened to me – i don’t really want to say what i’m referring to by “these” – but i don’t like the idea of being put …

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7

Here to listen to you

Here to listen to you

June 23rd, 2017by LostInDebt

Hi guys,

I thought I should be a leaning shoulder to several people out there willing to put an abrupt end to their lives.

Firstly, it is safe to say I have been down that road as well and I know exactly what it feels like to be empty and isolated. I held on to one string (scratch that, two strings actually) : my pregnant girlfriend and God… If my girlfriend wasn’t pregnant, I probably wouldn’t be writing this today because I wouldn’t have anything/anyone to look back to… She loves me too much to hurt her. Then, God! I remembered everything they said about suicide, how …

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2

I am Considered a Loser, Yet I am Privileged

June 20th, 2017by BlueDiamond

(Yay, I fixed the internet on my computer. It seems to be connecting well, and is moving faster. I did everything I could such as restoring it to its default, restarting the computer, and even got my dad to check it out. He wasn’t able to fix it. All I had to do was update the security, clear all browsing history, and most of all disable the proxy server. Now, I don’t have wait for long periods for a page to show up, or have to keep reloading the page because it didn’t show up. Hope it stays this way.)

By society’s standards, I am a …

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13

No one knows you

June 18th, 2017by arachnophilia

I have the ability to make myself an island. When I am an island I am apart from others, and their approval, their rejections, their problems and emotions have no bearing on me. I am keenly aware that no one really knows me, just as I don’t know anyone. No person can know another. When others think they know me, it’s really only a creative interpretation of fragmented evidence–actions they’ve seen me do, words I’ve said, which aren’t even a fraction of my lived experience. Even when I try to know myself, I fall short. My memory is limited, my attempts to describe myself biased, …

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2

Note to self:

June 18th, 2017by verbalhues

You must first fail to succeed, everything in life.

Like your first step as a baby, you try but fall so many times over, but eventually you learn to walk, and then run. That was your first challenge in life. If you decided to quit then, you wouldn’t have learned to walk at all. Sometimes we forget the very first lesson we learn in life: Baby steps.

With every stage in life, it presents different levels of challenges; fighting to survive your unfortunate circumstances or fighting to defend and accept yourself or fighting your dissatisfaction. These challenges help shape the person you had become and will become, …

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0

Just Stay Right Here

June 17th, 2017by smw24

Call Out to God!

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5

To whom it may concern (especially you, freeroma)

June 16th, 2017by mranony

I had fun this day. We laughed a lot. We talked a lot.

I learned something so big that it opens something in me.

I feel something in me growing. I’m starting to realize my love for myself. Of course I didn’t suddenly gain this. It’s a long process. And I’m managing to keep up with it.

My mother is very sick right now. And I want to try my best to be more mature. To be less afraid of life consequences. And just live.

Of course, I’ll worry still. I’ll still cry. I’ll still feel helpless.

But hey, it’s life. I have loved death so why not life too.

I …

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2

not again

June 14th, 2017by alexusdemi

I don’t want to be that post that you’re probably sick of reading, about falling into depression and healing from it. Three years. Three years of constant debating on weather i can stand myself or not. Starting to slowly fall back into a constant mind of self loath is so difficult. I’ve put my body and mind through to much shit to start being like this again. Scary thing is i don’t think im going to fight as hard as i did the first time.

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2

Some hope to share

June 11th, 2017by SoVeryTired

Six weeks ago, on the Saturday,  I put up a post that I had given up and was going to end it.

However, my conscience got the better of me, and I stepped back from the brink (quite literally, as I had a noose around my neck and was ready to jump) and reached out once more. Some of you here supported me wonderfully, and for that I am really grateful.

My psychiatrist upped one of my meds, and prescribed me some sleeping meds, and that was part of what helped me, as it gave me the breathing space and strength to tackle some really gnarly psychological …

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1

The Worst Nightmare Ever

June 8th, 2017by GerbzBaby

So if you don’t know in one of my past post I talked about having dreams that make me cry in my sleep or dreams that make me upset or sad (although I’m sure no one read it at all). They are harmless dreams that just reminded me of my past which I was sad I couldn’t relive differently. But this dream I had last night was not like the others I had.

The dream starts with me and my family on a passenger airplane. All seems well until something happens and the plane spirals out of control. In the dream I saw we

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To the ones who know loremaster

June 7th, 2017by My life is over

He is in the CCU and he tried to slit his wrist open and failed. He almost died he is in the hospital. Sorry for the death the hospital just called and said he is in critical condition.

 

loremaster82@gmail.com if any questions

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