I hate myself! I hate myself! Alcohol just keeps enabling me to do the worst shit but its the only thing that takes the edge off. I know im a bad person and its so fucking laughable how im still trying to convince myself im not. I keep scaring people and losing control and lashing out. I dont even want to be alive but i have to be. I have to be for other people but im just so tired and weak. I wish everyone would just stop clinging on to me so hard and let me go. I dont want to be here anymore and its been that way for a long long time.
Why do i keep doing these things. Please just let me go already so i can die