Ten days till  a year since my first attempt.
Overdosing is shit.
I wish I was braver. I would really like to jump in front of a train. Or off of a building.
All I ever research is the helium hood method and other painless ways to die. I wish I had the courage to face the pain of death. How can I expect to die when I can’t even work up the nerve to jump or cut or hang myself?
I pray to God everyday, asking Him to take my life.
My greatest wish is to fall asleep and never wake up.
If only death was that easy.
There’s no doubt about the fact that I want to take my own life. Every hour of everyday, I am secretly hoping in my head that I would somehow obtain the courage to just do it. I just need a push. A good one, too. I need somebody to say something that will make me go insane. That will make me so upset that I won’t have time to think about pain or consequences. Then surely I’d be gone.
1 comment
Bro I feel it. I feel that shit I promise you. Your post is uncannily similar to one of mine I posted a few weeks ago. Life does not get better, well not for me at least, I too have researched methods but cannot face the physical pain that they inevitably bring. I’ve been looking for a painless method but cannot find one (until now), after posting this I’m probably gonna take a look at helium method.
Man I swear, reading your post I swear you’re in the same boat as me. How I pray for a day where I don’t wake up, I’m glad I read this. OP you can add me on e-mail if you want to talk: lammy – don @ hotmail . com