Just a loan…

I go on weird walks; don’t follow me.  As I was walking tonight through a rift between two houses in my parent’s neighborhood I was talking to myself – only a bit and through my breath like some people do to motivate themselves on jogs (I imagine people do this sometimes).  It was dark, the rift is frightening.  I kept saying: “I am alone.  I am alone.”  And gradually it was: “I’m a loan.  I am a loan.”  I am but a loan.

Is this an inspiring notion, or one that can be debilitating: that one is but on loan from some hidden cue?