I have done some bad things throughout my life and have paid the price. However, when i do my best to do the right thing and make it work i am met with opposition on every corner. I want simple things. I met a woman after i was released from prison and have been with her ever since. She was my first everything. I ‘ve taken care of every member of her family. Was a father to her children. Taught them the right way. I have helped others along the way out of the goodness of my heart, not for anything in return. Hell, i give money to total strangers because of a feeling i have inside at the time. Now things are horrible and i have nothing. Yet good things wont come to me now that i am in need. I’m not conceited, however, i’m such a good looking man that women stare at me wherever i go and my wife thinks ridiculous things about me. To me now, life is not worth living. I have always been afraid of suicide because i believe in god so i’m scared of hell. Now i really dont care. Life is not worth it. All the work, effort, hurt, pain, and anguish is not worth the little bit of joy. So if i must burn then thats what it is i suppose. I’m thinking of leaving this world tonight or tomorrow. There are others i know that definately dont belong here either, just breathing up good air who will never do anything positive. People who just cause pain for others. There are good people sitting in hospitals who are in need of lungs, kidneys, etc.. and these others are useless but their healthy. Just taking up space. So before i go i was thinking about thinning them out as well. I just hurt so bad. A lot of it is just the way of the times. All these disrespectful children, women, and useless men who wont take care of their families. This world is awful and i feel so alone and dont want any part of it any longer. I pray every night that i never wake up. I curse the lord when i see the light coming through my bedroom window. By that statement some may say, “at least you have a bedroom, some place to stay . There are people starving in Africa”. Well they have been living that way for thousands of years and have survived. Besides you’d think they would get up and migrate to the coast where they could grow something instead of sitting in the desert dying. Anyway, i’ll see some of you in hell if there is one. Thanks.
3 comments
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend,
You could cut ties with all the lies,
That you’ve been living in,
And if you do not want to see me again,
I would understand.
I would understand.
The angry boy,
A bit too insane,
Icing over a secret pain
You know you don’t belong.
You’re the first to fight,
You’re way too loud,
You’re The flash of light,
On a burial shroud,
I know something’s wrong
Well everyone I know has got a reason,
To say,
Put the past away
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend,
You could cut ties with all the lies,
That you’ve been living in,
And if you do not want to see me again,
I would understand,
I would understand.
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsfreak.com/t/third+eye+blind/jumper_20136738.html ]
And well he’s on the table,
And he’s gone to code,
And I do not think anyone knows,
What they are doing here,
And your friends have left you,
You’ve been dismissed.
I never thought it would come to this,
And I, I want you to know
Everyone’s got to face down the demons,
Maybe today,
We can put the past away,
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend.
You could cut ties with all the lies,
That you’ve been living in,
And if you do not want to see me again,
I would understand,
I would understand,
I would understand…
(I would understand)
(I would understand)
(Understand)
Ya ya ya ya ya…
Can you put the past away?
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend,
I would understand
(I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend, )
I would understand
(I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend, )
I’m here for you if you wanna talk
Theres alot to talk about although nothing really means anything. It’s all or nothing. There are no shades of grey for me. Even when i was a child i knew that. Your either a good guy or not, you take prescription medicine to get stoned or you dont, these are simple questions, not complex. If you know your abc’s then you could answer. Life isnt that serious to spend more time trying to further enhance a lie rather than tell the truth with ease and be finished with it. At any rate, thanks for the reply.