. My “hidden” boyfriend of two and a half years committed suicide August 29th, 2011. Â No one knew about us. and cause he was 5 years older then me, we decided that it would probably be the best idea for no one to know. Â I only saw him 5 times while we were together.. crazy I know, but I believe it was love that kept up together. The last time I saw him he was upset with his father, and he said to me, ” Â i’m just going to kill myself” and I didnt believe him. I beat myself up daily for it. I dont get how I could be so fucking stupid to not see that he was in pain. I hate talking about it cause it still hurts so bad. I just wish someone understood.
2 comments
I can relate.. My uncle commited suicide when i was little i loved him so much he was my favorite uncle he use to play with me all the time! I miss him alot.. He killed himself cause he couldt find a place where he belonged the white people didnt want him cause he was a native and the natives didnt want him cause he was being raised by whites (Not to b rasist) the day i was suppose to see him… *Bang* no more uncle..
there’s no point in beating yourself up over it… It wasn’t your fault he felt the way he did… You were probably one of the good things in his life. Im really sorry you had to go through that and that he had to go through whatever he went through. Lifes cruel and sometimes there’s not much we can do. I had a friend try and kill herself because of me , (I told the counsler she cut, I thought I was doing something good…) she even tried to tell me. The whole day she brought up things about death and I knew something was off but I didn’t ask enough questions… Luckily shes alive today but we don’t talk.