Cut my wrists and black my eyes.
Thats all I ever do now. Cut my wrists and let my ex black my eyes.
I’m going back to him tomorrow…why? Because he loves me.
Dont you dare tell me that that isnt what love is. I’ll gladly wear makeup to cover my face.
I’ll gladly cut my wrists to remind myself what REAL pain is.
Getting beaten, raped, and verbally abused isnt pain, it’s life.
Sometimes when i stop cutting for a while, I forget REAL pain and I cry when he tries to hurt me…then i pick up my razor and slash my legs and wrists until I actually feel the pain..slice open the bruises he’s left on my legs for real pain…and then all of a sudden, the beatings dont feel so bad, the rape doesnt hurt so much, the verbal abuse isnt all that harsh.
It’s not so bad at all.
share your suicide story
Report Post
Please log in to report posts
5 comments
My heart goes out to you.
I dunno what to say really. I won’t say that isn’t love, but can I just say it probably isn’t what love is?
I’m not trying to say I understand what you’re going through, or that “I get it”, but it feels like you’ve been hurt so much that it is what you know?
Sorry, just rambling. But I from the few blogs I’ve read (sounds creepy I’m sorry), you do come off as someone with a beautiful soul. I think you deserve better…
Cheers.
The sarcastic tone of your message indicates that you recognise that the relationship with your ex is not normal or healthy.
Have you tried getting him to anger management classes etc.?
he has a therapist or whatever…been to anger management..it doesnt help. I realize it isnt normal or healthy but its all i can get and its more than what i deserve.
hey rain you say your from florida doesnt surprise me its a twisted fucked up state im in sumter county right in the center of it all i hope you can forget the horrible things that have been done to you and relize theyre are way better men out there my sister was abbused and raped and such and lemme tell you you might love him but he doesnt love you im sorry i dont really know how to talk to people none the less people suicidal like me. think ima go get some fresh air like u said if i can just get out of bed and onta my bike lol probs not a good idea w/e
Only you can set boundaries and decide what you are able to bear.
Good luck