I am new here, ways trying to find ways to kill myself on the net and came across this site. Well yes life sucks big time and after going through this site guess I am not the only one trying to find answers and frustated because every door seems to closed down with no key in sight.
Well about me I am in my mid twenties, lost my mother when i was 7, then dad passed away from cancer two years ago. now stuck with a husband (had to marry because it was my dad’s last wish and i could not let him down, i love him so much). People marry for love, but for me it was not the case, i am totally miserable with him, begged him for divorce but of no avail, he simply refuses. I am well educated and can totally support myself.
Everyday is a torture, i tried, god knows i have tried and also given 100% for this to work, but it simply doesn’t. My existing family (sister and bro-in-law) wont support me in this . I am tried of the physical and mental abuse I have to face everyday. yes i know am a coward, but i dont see any way out of this except to kill myself.
I did not ask for anything except love, care and support, but my husband and his family are killing me alive . I hate myself for having to suffer this. I am new to the US, so i have no driving license, not enough money to go back home or anywhere. I cant even work here due to visa issue, if i could have i would have walked out and supported myself.
I cannot take this anymore, it feels like the end. yeah i am scared as hell having to die painfully, but if this gets worse i have no option
2 comments
i kind of understand where you are coming from… i am sorry that you can’t find a way out of your current situation and i know that it is hard because the situation i am currently in, i can’t get out and i don’t like that i can’t.
Go to this website, click the state you live in, then type in the city. It will give you a list of Women’s shelters that will give you a place to live, food and help you find work. Many of the shelters are private church based establishments, so they will not care that you don’t have a work visa. They will help you obtain food, clothing, employment and eventually your own home. They will even come and pick you up from your current residence. Your husband has no authority to stop you from leaving with them, if you tell them that you wish to leave. If you tell me which city and state you live in, I would be happy to look up the information for you and provide you with a number to call, so that you can take control of your life back. I understand you wanting to fulfill your father’s last wishes, but I’m sure he wouldn’t want you to be miserable to the point of suicide. No one wants that for their children.
http://www.womenshelters.org/