The last moment i never knew.

I had an abusive older brother that lived with me through the ages 8-12. Things he did to me.. only one that scars me for the rest of my life. He slit my arms tied me up and put me in a box for a week. They said it was a miracle that the odds of me making it were in the negatives. I hated him ever since then. He died recently. The only thing mentioned in his last words was how much he regrets all he did to me and wished I could forgive him.. I think I’m done with life I feel horrible about all of this and I cant deal with it anymore he wrote that a year and a half ago and now hes gone. I dont care what happened between us I just want to hug you now.