i was just trying so hard to put my feeling into words. but nothing really came out, i guess im just not being honest with myself. not with anyone…i hate feelings. i hate thinking i could be with someone right now, i wonder how much emotional pain i’d put them through. but still sometimes i get this deep feelings for people, then the next minute i dont even feel a thing for them, maybe i really am bipolar. but right now i dont feel sad, nor angry at myself, i really am just not feeling anything. this month feels like its just floating.. i feel like im here, but my mind is just so blank i cant even think right. and to get to the point where you really dont feel anything, i dont think thats normal. i really want to feel something right now…just anything..but i guess people wouldnt really understand,or maybe im the one whos complicated to understand.