I don’t get it. What did I ever do? My dad says he loves me. But saying “I Love You” and meaning “I Love You” are big differences. Why can’t he love me and accept me. I’m his only daughter. His oldest of of two kids. I’m supposed to be his little girl… Why can’t he love me, why can’t he talk to me, why can’t he hug me, why can’t he tell me nice things, why can’t he be there for me…I just don’t get it.
He says i betrayed him.
I lived with him for 15 years, and our problems were getting worse and worse. He called me a fat ass.
I was bulimic for 2 years because of him. Thing is, I was never fat. Ever. Never weighed over 100.
But his words broke my heart and fucked me up in the head. For years. I don’t get it.
Than things got worse.
I wanted to live with my mom. I did my freshmen year.
I never was allowed to dye my hair when I was living with him, so my mom let me dye y hair a lighter shade.
He noticed it, the weekend I went to visit.
He yelled and screamed, gave me a black eye, almsot shaved all my hair off, slapped me, yelled and screamed more…
I cried for hours, I cut..
I don’t get it.
All for dying my hair a lighter shade.
Why can’t he love me?
Why can’t he accept me?
I want to be his little girl..
5 comments
i’m sorry i know how it feels, my father was the same way. im sorry. there is no way to get free of it all until your mother or you decide to do something about it. i was terrified for years but then my mother decided it was time to do something, court was NOT easy but all my mom got was my placement rights but iit was so much better then anything i could’ve hoped for. you’re mom, from what i can tell, has plenty of evidence to get placement or even full custody. but if you need anyone to talk to during all of this im here for you.
Well, I live with her, i just have to visit him every other weekend because of my probation ;/ But I thought things were going okay, but he turns around and tells my mom im a liar and he doesn’t believe a word that comes out of my mouth…but i have been completely honest with him..
oh okay, things always seem to be going okay at first but that one thing that you supposedly “do wrong” or “say wrong” makes him snap. i can’t tell you it will get better soon but it does and being free is the best feeling in the world. and if u dont mind me asking how long is your probation?
Im sorry.. there is so much more I’d like to say than just that.. but truth be told im out of words that can express how much better you deserve. I know words dont fix anything.. but know we’re here… I am here.
excuse me for being invasive. :/ but you can talk to me anytime you need.