I’m not anti social, but I am afraid of social situations. Â I don’t really fit in to any social “click” at college, and if I could choose one to be in I don’t really know which I would. Â This has left me a friendless, loveless, passionless loser. Â I fear that if I attempt to be social and try to meet new people and do new things, I will not be accepted, but rejected and cast aside. Â The thought of trying to talk to someone about this is terrifying. Â I would talk to family or a friend about this, but anyone I tell would certainly be annoyed at my complaining, and wouldn’t want to be friends with me anymore. Â These irrational fears have begun to affect my schoolwork and I’m to the point that I really just want to drop out of college and never leave my bed. Â I really don’t know what the fuck to do right now. Â I know I won’t kill myself but I really really really feel like being dead is my only option, here. Â I’m really scared and I just need some confirmation that I still exist and have not been forgotten by the human race. Â Please.
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3 comments
i know how you feel about not fitting into any group and being afraid of risking rejection.
over the past few years of feeling completely alone, i’ve sort of made friends with a couple of other people who feel alone, and it feels like enough for me. maybe if you take little risks, like talking to someone in class who also isn’t talking to other people, maybe you’ll meet someone interesting?
i have pretty severe social anxiety and i consider myself anti-social, but slowly i made a couple of close friends that are way better than any clique.
you’re definitely not forgotten by the human race <3
thanks darko. It’s nice to hear someone going through the same thing.
I also understand how you feel about not fitting in, fear of social situations, fear of rejection, and for me the worst thing of all, social isolation and a painful yearning for human connection. You are certainly not alone. I am here seemingly suffocating from lack of human contact and connection. I wonder how much longer I can bear the daily burden, pacing and pacing and pacing out the anguished misery and despair.