a realization

Coming from someone who has suffered from body image issues and eating disorders for more than a decade i can truly say i know how you feel.

I also know whatever i say, your mind will argue “but she’s no as ugly or fat or has this acne or this awful hair or -you name it- as i me”.

I don’t know how you look but what i do know is that you have 1 option: Accept it. Once you accept how you look, you can opt for changing your appearance, or leaving it as it is. You know how to change it: losing/gaining weight, treatments, surgery…

But once you’re done,is there going to be a difference? what will you be achieving? what has got a Victoria secret model that you don’t? men? cant you get a man? are you sure? men attention? what do you want that for? do you really need that much attention? … or is it fame? is that even worth it?…. could it be being envied by women? women envy others for a few seconds and then they keep going with life, after all, we are the center of our own worlds (no criticism intended in here).

Looking at yourself in the mirror and being at peace with that reflection? Let me tell you, after years of anorexia i am now at a weight i never dreamed of getting close to even holding my 10 years old cousin when steeping on the scale…. however now i am actually at peace with what i see in the mirror. I now have stretch marks, i have a few wrinkles in my face, i wear a few sizes more than what i did before…. a huge tragedy for that girl who lived 2 years ago…not anymore, this is just a body,one i didn’t chose to be born with (same how beautiful women didnt chose to be born with theirs), i can modify it if i want to, i do that by diet, exercise and basic beauty treatments…. but it is just a body, there are so many more important things around me than a body -as long as you nourish ans take good care of it- is not that important at all…. at least is not important in the eyes of my dog,my family, my friends ….not even the bullies’ eyes who made fun of you in HS…. and finally in my own eyes

As i said this might not help at all,i know that… but it’d be good if you start questioning why you want to be ‘beautiful’ so badly