so exhausted

I am so tired. It comes to the point where I need to go away forever just to be a peace.
I am young and have such an amazing future ahead of me and I would give anything to be strong enough to go after that. To achieve my potential and to be the best I can be. But I have no patience. I have everything that should make me happy. I have a boy who loves me, the best friends on the face of the earth and a well-off family… I have a relationship with God, no matter how pathetic it may be, I’m getting counciling and I’m surrounded by people who love me. How royally screwed up to I have to be to hate everything about myself (not my physical self, I’m fairly confident) but I hurt myself and cut myself to try and ease this constant pain inside me. I wish I never had to feel anything ever again.