I reached a point in my life where it doesn’t matter if I live or die.
All I do is leech, and provide service to no one.
When you reach a point like that, where the universe could go on functioning perfectly well without you, perhaps you should dip out.
save yourself some of the trouble, I mean you will die eventually.
Sometimes your past clouds up your future.
Sometimes you just have to fucking believe.
You have to say “Fuck That ************! I ain’t goin’ out like that!”
I can’t believe I had a noose tied and ready. I was soo gonna do it today. I was just like “Fuck It.” Completely Apathetic.
Nothing bad has happened recently, life is just stagnant, I know it’s only going to get worse once I graduate college.
I’m already on the fringe of society, I’m tired of these fucking college kids, I need a man.
I fell in love with my straight best friend. Just let that sink in a moment.
What do you do in that situation? I did what I knew in my heart I should do. I told him.
He took it well, nothing has changed between us. he treats me the same, he’s just never going to love me the same way.
He says that he loves me, and I believe him, and I know he’s my soul mate, that much is self evident. He just can’t allow himself to have romantic feelings for a guy. He’s one of those closed off straight dudes. I think it’s because some guy made him suck his dick when he was 8. He just fucked up my chances of ever being with that boy.
I love my friend, he’s everything I wish I could be. He retains the qualities that I lack in myself. God sometimes I just think about him pounding my ass and how great that would be.
Sometimes I just wish I could wrap my arms around him and hold him close to me, that’s all I wish sometimes.
I just know it’ll never be. He’ll never have those type of feelings for me.
I have a girl friend by the way, we’re polyamorous, she know’s I like guys and is ok with me dating them. We’re awesome like that.
Anyway back to the suicidal ideation I just wish I had the courage to fucking use the noose that I fucking looked up how to tie on youtube, with the rope that we use to tie the canoe to the roof.
“The rope that once towed L.A.’s car, shall now tow my soul to the afterlife. ”
As my infamous quote goes.
I’m so ready.
7 comments
It is soooo sad when you want to be with someone who does not share the same feelings.
I don’t know where this comes from but as I read your post I got a sense that you are a cool dude so hold on, I believe that the fact that you are still alive means its not your time yet.
Hold on,yeah?
It is soooo sad when you want to be with someone who does not share the same feelings.
I don’t know where this comes from but as I read your post I got a sense that you are a cool dude so hold on, I believe that the fact that you are still alive means its not your time yet.
Hold on,yeah?
Another thing: your best friend probably thinks you the best person too! So be content with who you are and be more of that!
Hello,
don’t worry! homosexuality can really be cured! It is the consequence of emotional wounds. Do not believe the liars that want to spread the big lie about gay pride. You are just a person, who temporarily has seen his sexual orientation altered, but I know quite a lot of people who, after therapy and understanding, returned to normal life and are happily married. I recommend you the book by Richard Cohen, “Coming out straight”. He himself was a homosexual, (as he was abused in childhood) but he became a doctor in psychology, is now married, has 3 children and helps other people like him. Cheer up, you are still young and you just can’t wait to see how beautiful girls are with their beautiful sexy bums.
best regards
I have a girlfriend you fucktard. I LOVE SUCKING COCK! I just want to suck the cock of the man that I love. Get over it.
And Yea I’m Holding on YCST, thanks man. I’m content with our friendship.
I know all about how “homosexuality is cured”, they take people and teach them to live a lie. You’re living a lie right now you poor fool. You just don’t have the fucking eyes to see it. Like Jesus said in the fucking Bible. It’s only for those with the eyes to see and the ears to hear. And you are deaf and dumb and dead, society has already long buried your ashes. May your soul rot in the prison of hell in servitude to your tyrant god.
lol… i’m not even gay, and i still find the notion of entire organizations being built around “curing the gay” to be highly offensive.
I think there is a choice as to whether to be honest with oneself and to openly engage in activities deemed “immoral” by our flawed society… and while i personally find the idea of two guys sexing rather gross, that doesn’t mean i think you shouldn’t be allowed to freely pursue and enjoy those activities, if they are pleasurable and acceptable to YOU. You can choose to be yourself, or you can choose to let everyone else tell you what you should be. Whose life is it, anyway? That’s right. Yours. Do what you want and enjoy it, before it’s over someday.
I honestly am shocked by the way people make “gay” such a big deal, when it really doesn’t have to be. Why can’t we just say “people are people, and not all are the same.” ? I’m not blind to the reasons the world doesn’t just all get along… but that doesn’t mean i approve of those reasons, either. It’s all just so convoluted and often unnecessarily complex… and we’re busy wasting time on trying to “cure gay?” I mean… /what!?/ lol. I can’t help but laugh at the sheer absurdity of the world, sometimes.
Good on you, sand_dude, for being real with yourself. More people should do that.