Clevername

It’s okay, it happens. I’m in the middle of one of those crazy coffee-wired wide-awake insomnia nights. Mornings. Right. 😛

Yeah… SRV was a special character. He was a beast on the strings for sure. 🙂

As for my (former) step-dad… he sort of “overplayed” SRV, and hearing it makes me think of him, but it’s not really that big of a deal. He’s just someone i prefer not to think about. lol.

And like i said, i don’t listen to music much these days, for various reasons, one of which is that i’ve been having ear issues for a while, which, as someone who has always had a “musical ear,” is very disturbing… frustrating… even torturous. It’s not painful, but anything obstructing my hearing is just unbearable. Even if i wanted to listen to music or play guitar, every sound would emphasize those issues constantly.

On the other hand, sometimes i start freaking out: “what if i go deaf!?” While i can still hear at all, i should be making music. But i’m not, because “everything else.”

I’ve been a gamer all my life. I had an original NES, but don’t own consoles now. I like to build computers, play computer games, and occasionally dabble in GIMP (image manipulation program), and even more (or less?) occasionally, attempt to learn more about web technology and programming, though i barely know anything about programming. Actually, i probably know more “about” programming, rather than ever actually programming. I’ve read a lot, but “all this” got in the way.

I’ve learned some HTML, CSS, started getting into javascript and python, but life got stupid and i put all that on indefinite hiatus. I’m “into” martial arts, but i’m not an anything. I know some stuff, and used to keep it fresh, but now it’s basically just fundamental movement theory used as a basis for piloting my body and efficiently navigating obstacles.

So yeah. Music, computers, martial arts… and i guess a heavy dose of philosophy and writing should be added to that list, since philosophy and writing are pretty much all i do anymore, even though it’s not in a structured way and doesn’t really gain me anything but perspective and further insight. I guess it all counts as practice, but probably not the most useful methods.

Lately, my favorite things to do are sit comfortably in peaceful relaxation, enjoying the silent stillness. It’s almost meditation, but technically not. I don’t think we’re supposed to smoke while meditating either, so there’s that. lol.

I like to… not be overwhelmed with any emotion that is not useful to me during the moment in which i feel it.

So i guess you could say… i like to Think, and to Not Think. I also like to attempt to verbalize complex thoughts, as concisely as possible (though i often fail miserably with conciseness).

lol.

Well… i consider myself a good driver, and while i don’t necessarily agree with the speed limit applying to me, i usually don’t exceed it by much. Not that i never have, but once upon a time i did something stupid and taught myself a harsh lesson about speed and driving beyond my abilities.

I used to smoke cannabis regularly, but in moderation. I’m a bowl-nurser. I’ll pack it and take a hit or two and wait a while. But, i haven’t smoked that in… 13 months. I “quit drinking” ~1.5 years ago, but have had a couple since, though none since xmas.

I have a hard time figuring out what “qualities” i might have, or if there are any worth mentioning. I find it much easier to just cut straight to the mood-killing red-flag stuff, thereby sabotaging any chance anyone might have to get to know me. I figure that stuff is the most relevant, and since it’s out of acceptable range, i might as well avoid setting anyone up for disappointment, especially myself.

I’m a leo, but i don’t necessarily put much weight on the zodiac. It seems so ambiguous that it could almost apply to just about anyone. If anything, there probably is some sort of typical difference in people based on the season in which they are born, or the climates and surrounding circumstances they experience during their most formative years, but it’s probably not as important as it’s made out to be. Still, i find myself noting signs and looking for correlations to behaviors. I guess it’s just ingrained in me. 😛