The last couple of days have sucked. I don’t know why. I just feel like crap and everything I try and do takes such effort. I have to force myself to do anything. I have meetings all week and a therapy appointment that I feel like blowing off. I doubt it would matter – but the other meetings, well, I would feel awful if I didn’t go. I am just so tired of sucking it up and smiling that fake bullshit smirk.
I wonder if anyone else gets scared by their thoughts. Like, when they start thinking they might actually do it – kill themself? I get like that when I don’t want to talk to anyone – like the last two days. I just have been sleeping a lot and thinking about it… again.
Back and forth. Up and down… again. Yeah, and down again.
1 comment
Therapy and meetings take their toll on me. In winter I was going Mon-Fri 5 days a week. Now I need to take Wednesdays off. Last week I went 3 days and I was cooked. For me, if I get too cooked then I’ll get the super fuck its really bad. That and the mkay please kill me’s.