I don’t know
why I started doing it.
I truly don’t have a good reason
and I don’t understand what happened in my head at that time
because I didn’t know it had a name.
I was in 5th grade
and all I wanted was to feel pain.
The dumbest is that I was in class
I took my ruler and started scratching my skin
inside the elbow
bellow the table.
Scars of cutting or any self-harming
were for me
like a trophy
that I liked to contemplate.
Or maybe
an indelible memory.