I long for the feeling.
Any feeling.
To cry at this point,
would be nothng short of a blessing.
I feel numb.
Numb,
like no combination of words could ever express.
I have people that have asked me to quit.
But they all go away in the end.
I need to feel something.
Anything.
And my blade beckons to me in the middle of the night.
I have to feel something.
How else
do I know
I’m alive?