mother doesn’t always know best

I am not the best child. I get bad grades sometimes, i’m not very active, sometimes I can be selfish and i fight with my siblings. I do dumb things like kids do. But my mother, she makes me want to die. She calls me a b*tch, or selfish, or ungrateful and it tares my self-esteem apart. She makes me feel like I am no one and that I shouldn’t exist. She makes me think that she doesn’t love me and she makes me feel worthless. I hate that feeling. That feeling makes me want to die.