I’ve lived my life fake smiling for everyone around me. They all believe i’m okay but i’m not. I hate myself. They way i look, act, breath. I hate all of it. I’m only alive for my best friend. She has kept me going but lately she has been drifting away and i can’t handle it. I hear people give me complements but i don’t believe it i can’t cause whenever they say them i hear a voice say their lying or it’s untrue. I am so insecure because of it. If see some one looking at me i hide my face from their judgement. Yeah i have friends. But i trust none. I have cut. I’ve stopped for now but occasionally i will scratch at my arms trying to make them bleed. I need help but i wont tell because everyone i have told just tells people or leaves me. I don’t wanna be alone anymore.
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2 comments
i think you need to find out who your true friends are and then tell them or go tell your parents they will help and trust me i know the feeling to hide ive got my bangs to hide my face but trust me you will be okay you just need to tell your doctor or a family member and make them understand, this will help because i went through the same phrase and still going through it.
Friends betray us, it’s true. Sometimes reaching out to an older, trusted person (parent, family friend, aunt/uncle) can give you some clear insight. You don’t have to be alone but to you have to work to get the companionship. Love to you.