I love helping people but over the past year I’ve felt like every time I help someone, it makes me feel worse. I hate seeing people so sad all the time and none of these people deserve it. I started feeling so bad about other people being sad that I started doubting my own life. I don’t understand it. why do some people get to live happy lives and almost never have to use all of their strength just to get out of bed in the morning? and why do others have to go through such torture? I kept thinking about it over and over and over and now I feel absolutely worthless and if I could, I would take in every one else’s pain and live through it, just so that every one else could be happy. I didn’t deserve a happy life and I told myself that so much that now I don’t have a happy life. I’ve completely ruined myself for putting other people’s lives in front of mine and now I can’t stand it and every day I want to scream everything out but I can’t. I don’t usually cut myself but I just did and now I don’t know how i’m going to hide this and I just want to apologize all the time but I don’t even know what i’m apologizing for
6 comments
6 comments
You’ll be okay. Try to focus on making yourself feel better. You must understand that no matter how hard you try, you’ll never be able to solve someone else’s problems for them. That’s all in their own hands (and whoever they live with). It sucks to see people hurting, but if they’re bringing you down with them it’s no good for anybody. Be strong, and then you’ll be able to deal with others in a manner where you won’t feel so responsible. You can try to be the sunshine in someone’s day, but you don’t have to be their savior.
Take care of yourself, ok? I wish you the best.
No good deed goes unpunished.
i’m so glad I joined this site. what you said really did mean a lot to me so thank you
You’re welcome. You seem like a good person. You have a big heart. That is good to see. (:
how do you stand it though? reading about how depressed people are and how much hell they’ve gone through, doesn’t it hurt to see them just slowly get worse over time?
Well, I do my best to help others when I can. I’ve been there, I know how it feels. I ended up on this site, so I’m no better off than anyone else. It does hurt to see people going through pain, but I know that whatever happens, it’s not my fault. If I tried to give advice or comfort, I did all I could. I’ll just have to hope that everyone will be okay.