Jan 31 2011 was the last time I was truly happy. I had picked up my date right after work, took her to one of my favorite spots and then to a party with friends and a good time was had by all. Soon after that my mom was killed via malpractice at a hospital. She was fine one minute and then a few hours late she died from horrible side effects of a misused drug. I kept it together for about three months trying to sue the hospital but then my family started to steal the inheritance we were supposed to share. My own immediate family told lie upon lie up on lie. And then from the stress and anxiety of it all my health tanked. I also ended up getting damaged by a doctor. He damaged my face with two horrible cortisone injections I didn’t want in the first place. Since then, for two years, I haven’t had a life. My my horrible family always seem to send me an email of lies just before the holidays to ruin any time off I might have.
I’m plagued with anxiety, self loathing (i hate seeing myself in the mirror), skin picks, facial dents from injections, a scar from another health provider and can’t seem to string together two or three decent weeks in a row. Even talking to someone about my problems now stresses me and leads to problems. I had an interview for a new job, a good job right in my field and my depression got in the way of responding to an interview request. I’m also getting older and running out of time to build a family of my own. So it pains me to think how together and functional I was exactly two years ago. Now I’m suffering a lot.
If you have healthy skin and general health please use your life well if you can. I wish I could. I wish everyone a good night or at least a night that’s not too bad. Okay? God bless.
2 comments
Healthy skin should have no bearing on quality of life. F*** what the world sees you as. If you can’t see yourself as the competent, cool individual that wrote this post, you’re nuts. Others that are caught up living their lives vicariously through the Kardashians, however, may not agree.
Screw people who bring you down. You’ve proven by your admission of annoyance that you’re better than that. Don’t let some asshole(s) influence the way you see your life. If you do, you’ve given them control over your personal feelings. If that’s the way you want to live your life, you might as well call them before you get dressed, or even take a dump, to make sure they’re okay with your actions…
@ninth)amendment
I suppose it shouldn’t have a bearing but it does but a lot of it hinges on how I feel about it. Even if someone says it’s okay I still see what I see which is the damage of the last two years and on going problems that seem to pop up every few days now. I’m gonna try to heal things up but I don’t care much what others think, I care what I think. Thanks for the feedback. I’ll think about it some more.