I’ve fucked up. It was one of my best friends’ birthday party and we had drinks, long story short I let it all out to the ten of my best childhood friends, ruining their night, oh I am so sorry for you! Their reactions reinforced the idea that they are too stupid to understand my problems and should never know the truth. Just to cover up and stop them from telling everyone and their mother causing me to have to see a shrink or something, I’ve had to apologise to all of them and lie about what I said even though it was completely their fault. I struggle with ever believing what I think, like I always tell myself that I am not depressed or suicidal, I am just, pretending? How do you know? I just want to die and it will all stop, but how? How do people go about it?
share your suicide story
Report Post
Please log in to report posts
3 comments
I think you just know when you’re depressed or suicidal. There’s no use fooling yourself that you’re just pretending if you truly feel it, that’s just delusional. I don’t know how other feel it but when I do, simply, I don’t want to live. I don’t want to be around people, I feel an incredible emptiness in myself, and I think about killing myself. Some people find ways to deal with it; medicine, drugs, supportive friends/family, therapy. But some can’t.
Am I just being silly? It’s been years but I don’t believe myself. My friends tell me to snap out of it and my family call me a drama queen….
Try seeing a professional counselor. Friends, especially in a group, can be unprepared to deal with it. It takes maturity. Keep looking. Good luck.