Hello Guys,
It’s day three for this. I don’t know why I keep doing this… Maybe its because I need to write my feelings down somewhere. I haven’t been okay or good. I’ve been stressed, tired, and depressed. Sometimes I just want a hug, but none of my friends know about me being depressed. Except for one, but I’ve never met them. I talk to them. I text them. Facebook message them. But I have never met them. And I can’t ask them for a hug, because if I would I know I would feel guilty. I would feel selfish. I would feel like a burden. Or annoying or clingy. So I don’t.
I guess I shouldn’t be posting when I need to study, but right now I’m going through a phase of images and voices and I can’t really concentrate on my studies.
My mind is crazy right now. With finals and stressing out and just not knowing what to do. I went back to not eating breakfast… In the morning I just don’t have the energy to. I guess it doesn’t really matter… Well I should get on to studying. Here’s a poem:
I remember as a kid
Being loved
Being cared for
Thinking the idea of suicide
Was so terrible
But now the thought
The though of suicide
Is in my mind 24/7
Would you jump?
What if I don’t want you to jump?
You should live
Not die because I died
But I still wonder
Would you jump?
Au Demain (I fixed it :P)
5 comments
Hey. It’s okay to need others. It’s human.
Anyway, a hug is really not that big an effort for anyone and probably mutually rewarding.
So here’s a virtual one. 🙂
Why so depressed LetItGo?
I have discovered the world isn’t all happiness. I have gotten more insecure and depressed. Not really sure why…
You are right, the world can strait up suck sometimes. However, I may be beneficial to walk back through your memories and try and see where these insecurities started. I don’t believe suicide or even practicing for it is a good idea for you.
The insecurities started I guess when the bullying started. So third grade…