about a week back i was so stressed and bugged out i couldnt remember my password for shit and i needed to vent bad. i couldnt though bcuz of a fuckm password. all this resulted in was me getting more and more worked up. i tried resetting by going through the steps but every second felt as though an entire life went by and i couldnt get the thought of making my life actually end. i didnt want to be here anymore. instead of coming here i went online to look at different ways to commit suicide and watch videos of others committing the act. idk why watching these videos somewhat made me calm down. i can only hope for my own soul that it gave me peace to see these people finally being able to rest in peace for them, but i know it was the sick thing in me yearning for death. to scared to give myself the peace i need. im scared that if i forget a password on a computer, thats all i need to go to that dark place and that other peoples pain and death brings me peace. why? this all makes me sad