So… I haven’t posted in a while. Most of you won’t care, others might be curious, but… Though I only posted here a few times, I thought I should give an update. An explanation.
I’m fifteen years old. I’m not an attention seeker. And I’m not faking.
A few months ago, I cracked. Years of trauma and abuse piled up until I just couldn’t take it any more. I fell into a dark place. I started cutting, stopped eating… Sometimes for weeks on end. I was miserable. Lost all of my friends. Eventually my parents took me to a counselor. But that just made things worse. I didn’t want to talk. I just wanted to be left alone.
After about a month with no progress, my parents agreed that I could stop going.
About a month after that, I stopped cutting.
And now… I’m fine. I don’t know what changed, but I just feel happier now. Things are good. For once my smiles are actually genuine. My laughter real… I’m not sure why or how this happened, but… I actually feel like I have a chance now.
The urge to cut is gone.
My appetite is back.
But most of all… I’m back.
3 comments
Ah, the Irish girl. You first posted on this site right around the same time I started visiting here.
Welcome back Ciara, glad you’re doing better. Keep up the writing.
I’m surprised someone remembers me, to be honest.
Thanks, though. I do plan on keeping up writing, though I don’t have a lot of time.
Well, you reminded me a bit of someone I know. Also, I think just the fact that you mentioned you were Irish left an impression on me to be honest, haha. I love Ireland and Scotland. Scotland is trying for independence again apparently…oh man. I commented on one of your posts under the name PhoticEclipse, btw.
Yeah, time is always a problem. I sometimes wish there was a pill that would eliminate the need for sleep. So much time wasted…but then, sometimes that’s a good thing.