It’s been a while, last time I said anything it was a shitty goodbye before I was going to take my life. I succeeded, I stayed dead for a couple of minutes, but unfortunately I got better. I just haven’t gotten around to getting on the site since then.
Well, this is it. The worst day of the year. I’m twenty three now and my only good brother and the best friend I’ll ever have are six feet under. Another year has passed and I’m still an ugly cripple that can’t even go into public because of how bad my PTSD is. I’ve downed two bottles of vodka and I’m still not drunk enough to get me through the rest of the day. Sorry this is such shit to anyone reading it, I suck a lot less at writing things when I’m sober.
Anyway, once again it’s my birthday and I’m completely alone.
1 comment
This post is definitely not shit, you can say anything you like if it helps in some way or form.
I’m sorry about the birthday situation, I know how it feels. I’m well acquainted with spending birthdays and holidays alone. Maybe just think of it as any other day, because that’s what it basically is, so there’s no need to feel even worse than on any other day. Also, I’m sorry to hear about the PTSD, it’s debilitating and just generally awful. Do you see a therapist? If not, I would highly recommend it. PTSD isn’t something a person can deal with alone.