the ultimate fuck you

I feel like committing suicide is the ultimate act of telling the world to fuck right off. In our society where everything is out of our hands and we are prisoners in a system where we have to “choose”, killing yourself is the only way out. We’re not free unless we’re dead. We’re not truly living, unless we’re dead. There has been an illusion, created to ease our minds, that we can take life in our own hands. We choose where to live, what to study, which job to practice, who we marry, if we have children, where we go, how we sleep, what we eat. But on the other hand, I feel like we have no choices at all.
You have to participate in our society because of the basic necessities like clean water and a roof over your head. The comfort we’re used to is impossible to achieve if you’d live outside of our society. But if you want these basic necessities, you have to take along everything else too. The pressure to perform, to choose difficult courses so you have high grades and graduate with an honor mentioning. We have to attend the best uni’s and study for years and years to get a piece of paper that allows us to solicit for a job. Then you become an ultimate grey mouse: you get up, eat, go to work, work all day, come home, eat, sleep and repeat. For the rest of your life. With the occasional holidays/weeks of free time when you try to forget how fucked everything is. But it’s never enough to “recover” from a year of hard work. Then you grow old. You take care of grand children, go golfing, go to the sea. You fall or go crazy or can’t take care of yourself anymore so you to a retirement home. There you’re bored shitless.
Then you die.

Suicide seems a much better option than a whole life of this bullshit. It’s the only action you fully decide yourself: to live or to die.