I get annoyed when people, and yes it’s the women that are guilty for this, saying genetic lies that don’t mean anything at the end of the day such as you’re beautiful, you’re awesome, and you’re great. Yeah, “You’re beautiful” is the most common one. If I hear that quote again, I’m going to punch someone.
First, they don’t mean anything if they’re being said to other people over and over again. There was an article about low self-esteem saying that in the 80s school programs would try rise the student’s self-esteem by constantly saying these quotes. The students with low self-esteem were smart enough to know that they were being told to other students, and because they knew this, the quotes didn’t help them.
They are so vague that they leave you wondering, “Well, what makes me beautiful or great.” Yeah, you can ask them this question, and they’ll answer such as you can draw well or you’re nice, and nice means you’re average, you’re boring. Great may go with those answers, but not beautiful because they don’t define your outward appearance. This is frustrating for someone who is autistic because we take things literally. Last I checked beautiful meant pleasing to the eye, but because we don’t hurt someone’s feelings, so we have to say it to everyone. Come on, you would say “You’re beautiful” to a woman who weighs 700 pounds and is eating herself to death. No, you get her help because she is dying!
Just stop trying to create this reality where everyone is a winner that they’re intelligent or attractive in their own way. Ugly people exist. Stupid people exist. Fat people exist. Losers exist. The only thing we’re fooling are ourselves.
I say just deal with the shitty cards you were given and make something out of it.
BTW, if you want to help someone’s self-esteem. Just listen to them, and list specific examples that they do such as I appreciate that you helped me do the dishes, or maybe you have pretty blue eyes. For the love of Prime, be honest about it. Don’t tell someone that their stick figure drawing is art, instead give them constructive criticism.
Fuck me! Here’s a video that could explain my point better:
13 comments
WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE THEM BY CALLERING THEM VULGAR ADJECTIVES SUCH AS UGLY, STUPID, FAT, ETC. THEY DONT THINK OF THEMSSELVES AS UGLY UNTIL YOU TELL THEM THEY ARE. WE ARE MADE TO LOVE AND CARE FOR OURSELVES. IF YOU HAVE ENOUGH LOVE TO OVERFLOW TO INDIVIDUALS OTHER THAN YOURSELF THEN YOU ARE A LUCKY ONE.
ID SUGGEST STAY UP YOUR OWN ALLEY…. MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS AND STOP TRYING TO LABEL SOMEONE ELSE WITH YOUR JUDGEMENTS. TELLING SOMEONE THEY ARE BEAUTIFUL IS AN EXPESSION OF LOVE. THEY ARE SHARING A FEELING THAT THEY HOLD INSIDE ABOUT THE VALIDITY OF THAT PERSON’S EXISTENCE. THERE IS NO WORD LIKE BEAUTIFUL IN THE HUMAN LANGUAGE. IT IS AN ORIGINAL WORLD ENDOWED WITH LIMITLESS MEANING, THAT WAS CREATED OUT OF A FEELING OF PASSION
YOU DONT HAVE TO LABEL A PERSON INSTEAD OF GOING AROUND TELLING PEOPLE THEY WERE BEAUTIFUL (DESCRIPTIVELY) I WOULD TELL THEM “GOD BLESS THEM”
Bless: to bestow good of any kind upon
to protect or guard from evil (
I would say a vulgar judgement onto another human being is a form of evil.
But ugly, stupid, fat, whatever else you say……. those are good terms for a gag.
IT DOESNT HELP SELF ESTEEM TO USE SUCH VULGAR TERMS!!!
They don’t need judgement..
It seems like she struck a chord. Are you all right there?
Did all those caps make you feel better? huh?
LMAO
beauty (n.) Look up beauty at Dictionary.com
early 14c., bealte, “physical attractiveness,” also “goodness, courtesy,” from Anglo-French beute, Old French biauté “beauty, seductiveness, beautiful person” (12c., Modern French beauté), earlier beltet, from Vulgar Latin bellitatem (nominative bellitas) “state of being pleasing to the senses” (source also of Spanish beldad, Italian belta), from Latin bellus “pretty, handsome, charming,” in classical Latin used especially of women and children, or ironically or insultingly of men, perhaps from PIE *dw-en-elo-, diminutive of root *deu- (2) “to do, perform; show favor, revere.” Famously defined by Stendhal as la promesse de bonheur “the promise of happiness.”
[I]t takes the one hundred men in ten million who understand beauty, which isn’t imitation or an improvement on the beautiful as already understood by the common herd, twenty or thirty years to convince the twenty thousand next most sensitive souls after their own that this new beauty is truly beautiful. [Stendhal, “Life of Henry Brulard”]
Replaced Old English wlite. Concrete meaning “a beautiful woman” in English is first recorded late 14c. Beauty-sleep “sleep before midnight” (popularly regarded as the most refreshing) is attested by 1850. Beauty-spot “dark spot placed on the face formerly by women to heighten beauty” is from 1650s. Beauty-contest is from 1885; beauty-queen is from 1922 (earlier it was a show-name of cattle and hogs). Beauté du diable (literally “devil’s beauty”) is used as a French phrase in English from 1825.
But as it is hardly possible to define all the properties which constitute beauty, we may observe in general, that beauty consists in whatever pleases the eye of the beholder, whether in the human body, in a tree, in a landscape or in any other object. [from definition of BEAUTY in Noah Webster’s “Dictionary of the English Language,” 1828]
Called etymology….. words mean as much as the intention behind them!
Well… I feel that people throw those ‘compliments’ onto people, just to make themselves look better. They don’t even mean it anyway. Its cheesy. They might as well shove their comments up their butt.
It’s a way of courtesy in some countries…. immediately when you meet anyone, you kiss their cheeks and call them beautiful.
Ugly and beautiful, obviously, both have metaphorical and literal definitions. But the way I see it, if you really think someone cant be beautiful in their own right simply because you think beauty only has one definition, and that is physical attractiveness. I’d call you an idiot. And sure you’re right when you say a 700 pound woman needs help and not praise, but that doesn’t mean she can’t have any defining qualities in her personality. But that example completely sets up any argument for failure. If you want to call someone something to compliment them on attractiveness use pretty or something. But don’t call people ugly just cause it’s true, then you’re just being an asshole.
First, I never said that we should go around that start pointing out people’s flaws by calling them names. That’s not my point. I was trying to suggest a different approach, instead just slapping a vague quote just for sake of making the person feel better.
It just feels dishonest.
Yup I agree with you to an extent and Gavin often says what I (and I’m sure many others) also think but are too polite to say publicly. There is a lot of lying going on and it comes from the idiot Left who create a fake fantasy world where obese people get ego-boosts and lies and are told they’re fine the way they are, despite the serious health problems it creates.
There is no advantage to being handicapped in any way-the word is self-explanatory. If I ever became paralyzed I’d demand euthanasia-because the quality of my life is over. One’s life can be ended even if you’re still breathing, surviving is not enough.
I actually had a friend claim he’d be fine being completely paralyzed and dependent on others for survival. I think people say such things because they’re just virtue-signaling. They wouldn’t actually want to be paralyzed for even a minute-once they knew how much they’d suffer and how their lives would be radically diminished.
Ofc at the same time I don’t support being mean/cruel to anyone for whatever deficiencies they have in life, however with obesity, that can be changed and people should be encouraged to get to a healthier weight, or just leave them alone. Most people usually know their own flaws and if they’re sensible they try to fix them in their own time-sometimes it can take years because a lot is going on in their life.
A very close relative of mine became obese after having kids-but her life was a mess in many ways, she was depressed, suicidal, ate poorly and had to overcome a lot of obstacles in her life. Eventually when her life got better she was able to tackle her weight issue and got back to her normal size-it was a dramatic change but it did take her 2-3 yrs of diet, exercise and discipline to get in shape again.
There is a kernel of truth in telling people they are beautiful but it’s only treating a symptom, not the cause.
Telling people positive things about themselves * with * sincerity * probably does make them feel better and avoids triggering. But this leaves the inner critic in place. If you want people to be more positive about their image then you need to help them kill the inner critic. Not a trivial task.
We should teach children to say nice things to each other because it teaches kids that giving the outer critic free reign is not acceptable in our society. All of us benefit from this.
Millions of kids are told every day by their own parents they are lazy, useless, unwanted, disappointing, hopeless, dumb, retarded, untrustworthy, etc & etc. This is abuse. Full stop. Media-driven shaming is a little added icing on this negative shit cake. These kids grow up believing their parents lies and they eventually turn around and transmit the same lies to their children.
Yes, giving every kid a trophy is silly. But it’s just an early attempt to address this systemic problem. Refusing to address the problem at all is worse.
Fuck the world if this is the way people think. Have you ever thought beyond your provincial superficial minds that maybe some of us really do think handicapped, asymmetrical, fat and skinny people are beautiful? I see a dog with 3 legs and I think she’s beautiful. I see a tree with twisted limbs and I think it’s beautiful. I feel the same way about human appearances and the only time I say someone is ‘ugly’ is when their attitudes are ugly like that Fuck who made the video. What an ugly small minded cynical turd. And If this comment offends anyone you deserve it. To the rest of you, you ARE beautiful and I don’t care if you have a horn growing out of your face. The only ugly ones are the ones who make a big negative deal out of appearances and compliments.
“I was watching Ellen in a bar the other day”