I don’t have much of a fight left in me anymore. I’ve said this and have felt this way for around 20 years. There’s that small glimmer of hope that “things will get better”, but what I’ve experienced is that the same familiar experiences perpetually occur with different people and different places. That hope is rather disappointing and never presents itself. I know that I am the common factor to my problems… so I ask…what is so innately wrong with me? Is it that my expectations for myself are too high? Was I given a bad hand? Existential questioning doesn’t lead to any answers so what then? There are no temptations to keep me going, nothing that is worth breathing extra breaths. I feel that the end for me is near.