so why am I suddenly so scared? I know if I can just summon the courage to get through one terrifying moment it will all be over. I have been dreaming about this and preparing for this for months. I should be read. I tried to improve my life and it didn’t work. I know this is the right thing…
Please, please God, just give me the strength to do it and let it work. let me go. Just let me go.
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‘let me go’… gods there’s so many times that’s crossed my mind, came out.
It’s an exhausted plea. Just let me be done with all of this, I don’t want it anymore.
I think there’s different right things. It can be right to stay and go at the same time..
I wish it was easier here.
It just hurts so much. I wish I could stay, but I tried that and I couldn’t make a go of it.
It sucks when nothing out there seems responsive to your efforts. I know that something eventually will, just not if it’d seem worth it after everything else. A promise that for awhile things will improve doesn’t help now.
There doesn’t seem to be any constancy in positive things.. what goes up likes to come down twice as hard.
Yeah that is the thing…there are moments when things are ok but they are few and far between…