I just want to shine, not in a way that detracts from others. Yet people are not able to understand so I isolate myself. Life is something different to me apparently. To them it is ego and ‘purpose’ that they have been brainwashed to believe. They will hurt others to get what they want. 

I hate a lot of things for someone with so much love. Just the idea that it’s all getting to me is such a hard thing to resist. Too much trauma, not enough hope. Hope is the affliction of a romantic.

The people I love do not want me, nor do I want anyone who expresses love for me. How much longer does life have to feel this way?