I believe the effectiveness of a therapist depends on the connection you make with them. They have to “get” you. If you connect with a therapist, there’s still the matter of what happens next – they offer you tools that you must use to build new thought processes. Like buying a nice hammer from a tool salesman, if you don’t use it to hammer nails, you’ll never build a house. Therapists just provide the tools, but if they don’t understand the inner workings of YOUR mind, good luck with that.
I could not have said it better myself. The connection is crucial. It took me 8 tries to find a therapist I could work with and she with me. The others where nearly useless. This one is gold.
Yes this is true. The one and only therapist I saw was focused on money. She’d never have a short chat with me on the phone, I’d have to book an appointment with her.
I won’t knock her though, she was a very nice person and tried to offer some helpful advice but the trouble was that I also used to read a lot of psychology and I knew what she knew.
Whenever she brought up a psychological concept/idea and asked if I was familiar with it, I’d explain it to her and she’d say that she really had nothing to teach me then.
Well as you can imagine for someone to drag themselves to a therapist, it means they were really desperate/hurting in their life, which I was. So in a sense, it did help just to know someone neutral is there and they’re not judging you, they simply listen and try to help you see things that you might’ve missed.
So I don’t regret seeing her and every penny was worth it, I only did 10 sessions till I realized I was just wasting my time. I can’t say it’ll work for others-statistically my psych prof said that therapy has about a 50% success rate. There is no harm in trying and I’ve encouraged others to do it in general if you have a few hundred bucks lying around. Just don’t expect to be ‘cured.’
At the end of the day, I realized why I was depressed, hated my life and worked on changing things (this was after graduating from high school).
8 comments
I believe the effectiveness of a therapist depends on the connection you make with them. They have to “get” you. If you connect with a therapist, there’s still the matter of what happens next – they offer you tools that you must use to build new thought processes. Like buying a nice hammer from a tool salesman, if you don’t use it to hammer nails, you’ll never build a house. Therapists just provide the tools, but if they don’t understand the inner workings of YOUR mind, good luck with that.
I could not have said it better myself. The connection is crucial. It took me 8 tries to find a therapist I could work with and she with me. The others where nearly useless. This one is gold.
The part about the tools is spot on. The part about the thought processes is spot on too.
It’s an attitude thing. If you’re into that sort of thing, give it a try.
Yes this is true. The one and only therapist I saw was focused on money. She’d never have a short chat with me on the phone, I’d have to book an appointment with her.
I won’t knock her though, she was a very nice person and tried to offer some helpful advice but the trouble was that I also used to read a lot of psychology and I knew what she knew.
Whenever she brought up a psychological concept/idea and asked if I was familiar with it, I’d explain it to her and she’d say that she really had nothing to teach me then.
Well as you can imagine for someone to drag themselves to a therapist, it means they were really desperate/hurting in their life, which I was. So in a sense, it did help just to know someone neutral is there and they’re not judging you, they simply listen and try to help you see things that you might’ve missed.
So I don’t regret seeing her and every penny was worth it, I only did 10 sessions till I realized I was just wasting my time. I can’t say it’ll work for others-statistically my psych prof said that therapy has about a 50% success rate. There is no harm in trying and I’ve encouraged others to do it in general if you have a few hundred bucks lying around. Just don’t expect to be ‘cured.’
At the end of the day, I realized why I was depressed, hated my life and worked on changing things (this was after graduating from high school).
*10 one-hour sessions, going once a week per session.
A glass of water can quench your thirst or drown you. It depends on how you drink it.
I haven’t had a lot of benefit from therapists.