Approaching Deadline

I appreciate the lead time to say our goodbyes, and I won’t be trying to talk you into any alternatives at this point. I also appreciate you giving yourself that time to plan, a good plan is more likely to succeed. Whatever you do, I want you to succeed at it.

What can I say? Hope seems to have just abandoned us all.

I’m lucky, or cursed to have enough nicotine and THC to numb the pain for now. My new hope is so maladaptive, so bad; the hope that deregulation will screw up the DEA to the point that my access to stronger sedatives is unrestricted.

So I wouldn’t know the exact date of my exit, but that particular method has the advantage that everyone writes me off as an addict before the plunge occurs. I come from a family of addiction, this has always been on the shelf unused. Sedative addiction is one of the few noble ways out I’ve found. In that, it allows me to feel a little better before the end.

who knows what lies beyond, we are becoming explorers of the ethereal. However, many great people have gone ahead. Maybe nothing, that would be fine with me. There’s no future here either, there won’t be any me here one way or another.