i didn’t get out of bed today. i have many days like this. my birthday is this weekend.
what is the point. i didn’t ever want to live this long. i was suicidal at age nine. i’m still suicidal. i’ve done everything i can think of to make things better.
the only reason im still here is for my family. when they are gone….thankfully i will be able to leave too.
3 comments
I have been suicidal for a decade plus. It is not a preferred way to live. I am in the same boat. I am waiting for people to not care or give permission.
I have no encouraging words for you. All I have is alignment. I agree with your sentiment. I too wish to fade and soon.
I’m so sorry you’re in such a bad place right now. I struggle with depression and suicidal thoughts too myself. I know you don’t want to hear this, but maybe you could give your life to others. Volunteer, get involved with the people around you, if you can, travel to places like South America and Africa and see what the people there live like. If you can’t live for yourself, live for others. You’re doing so for your family, and that’s amazing. But you can do it for more people too. You can change people’s lives for the better. When I was doing as badly as you are now, I didn’t want to hear anything like what I’m telling you now. It was all BS, and I was done. But after I began to help people, it was amazing. I just began by listening to my friends, and slowly I engaged in the world. It all sounds very corny… but it works! You think that your life has no significance in the world, and yet it does! Of course, I don’t know your story and I’m not pretending to. I’m just trying to give you more options than you’re giving yourself. I hope everything turns around for you. My best wishes! And know that there are always people that will help you if you let them!
i have the same goal. the unfortunate part is to wait =/