I will hang myself, next time I’m home alone, the soonest chance I get I will attemp, but I’m worried I’ll fail. also, I don’t know, maybe not quite %100 ready to die yet? %99.9? and that extra %0.1 is instint to survive? I will have a go. I have other, more lethal options if this does not work.
~Jaspar
2 comments
Hi Jaspar, I was shocked when I read your name because it’s the same as my son’s, who’s sixteen and depressed himself…his is spelt with an e though.
I feel bad for you Jaspar, I really do. You’ve stopped going to school? My son has too. Thsis is getting spooky! I worry that my son may be having thoughts of suicide, but he doesn’t talk much, he lives very much in his own world most of the time.
Let’s try and unravel your reasons a bit more? I read your other posts, and it seems you feel your family has no respect for you. School was getting on top of you, can you maybe say a bit more about the whys and the hows? You’ve never had a girlfriend. Well that might be difficult when you’re obviously so depressed, but I don’t think you actually told us how old you are?
I’m glad that you haven’t looked too much into suicide methods yet, by the sound of it. I don’t want you to kil yourself Jaspar, I really don’t. I just think, that could be my son talking like this on a website full of strangers. Maybe getting no response or maybe ‘the wrong’ response, and feeling worse.
Please post in more detail about how you have come to feel like this. There is definitely someone out there, maybe even on this site, who could offer you some help and understanding that might ease the pain even for a little bit. You are very much not alone in your feelings Jaspar. It would be ideal if you had someone you could turn to in real life of course. A trusted adult. I hear you say you’ve tried therapy and meds and you feel it hasn’t worked. Can you think about what you would want for yourself if you could have anything? Consider how life might be different for you? And then maybe break it down into small steps and start working towards it?
We’re here to listen Jaspar. I’m here to listen. I will look out for a response from you. Lots love, Zoe x
Thank you for this…funny, I didn’t think Jaspar or Jasper was a common name, anyway, I’m 12 and might say more about my situation in another post.